Burns Park Loop

I walked and jogged the Burns Park Loop this morning and early afternoon in 1:21:30. It's in the mid-50s today, and shiny blue.

Ridge Road Loop

Man, it's just non-stop cold here. We got a dusting of snow this morning, and I think our high was 34°F. It was 33 when I walked the Ridge Road Loop late this afternoon in 1:01:07.

The NFL Green Bay Packers defeated the Chicago Bears, 33-28, at Soldier Field yesterday. The Packers had to win to make the playoffs, and did on a 4th-and-8, 48-yard touchdown pass from Erin Rodgers to Randall Cobb in the final minute. I watched the first half at Hooters, which sucked. It was the only place I could think of that shows any game you want. At halftime I decided my couch and a radio sounded preferable. Green Bay will host the San Francisco 49ers at around 3 p.m. CST next Sunday. The game will be broadcast nationally on Fox.

Park Hill Loop

This morning was lovely for a tour of the Park Hill Loop—upper 40s, mostly sunny, and calm. I jogged for a total of maybe five minutes, but mostly walked it in 1:14:03.

EVIDENCE DEAF PEOPLE MAY OFTEN LAUGH AT THINGS THE REST OF US RARELY NOTICE
"He had the presence of mind to pick up the boy and run it into the end zone."
—closed captioning on television at a local bar, where I watched the first half of the Packers-Bears game. Packers end Jarrett Boykin picked up a ball—fumbled by Aaron Rodgers—and ran 15 yards for a touchdown. Everyone else on the field thought it was an incomplete pass, so Boykins ran past a bunch of Bears who reacted as though they couldn't care less. Only Boykin had the presents of mind to pick up the boy

OVERHEARD
"I don't like to make predictions, particularly concerning the future."
—panelist on Fox News Sunday

Burns Park Loop

I walked the Burns Park Loop this morning in 1:31:04. Before I started, I was pleased to have read on a Facebook post by Karen Eckman that her sister inlaw Heidi Eckman is now engaged. Didn't I win a bet?

Ruth has been in and out the last three days. Merle Malone, my backyard neighbor, told me she also spends time with a family across the street from his house. Right now she's curled up on my couch.

35th Street Loop/Oaklawn Park simulcast

I walked and jogged the 35th Street Loop this morning in 54:40 or so. I've cleared my watch since then. Tim Cooper and I spent much of the afternoon at Oaklawn Park, where I lost a total of $2.50 betting on races from Tampa Bay Downs, Gulfstream Park in Miami, and Fairgrounds in New Orleans. Man, we had fun, surrounded by good old men having the same.

Burns Park Loop

I walked and jogged the Burns Park Loop this afternoon in 1:20:37. Ruth walked up the hill on Orange Street yesterday morning and I haven't since seen her. She is so perfect, by cat standards, that I think she'll be fine wherever she winds up.

Levy Trail

I walked three miles on the Levy Trail this morning in 44:04.

Levy Loop

I walked into Christmas morning on the Levy Loop. I was out for 30:43.

Orange Street Loop

I walked the Orange Street Loop this morning in 44:04.

Walt Webb's Fat Chicks beat the Green Bay Packers, 120.81-101.29, in the Cooper Bowl on Sunday. My disappointment was offset by the great Hash Christmas bash, and a stray cat named Ruth. She's hung around for a week or so, until yesterday morning when I finally adopted her. She was the absolute superstar at the Christmas run. I have never seen a pet more comfortable in a crowd.

Toby Von Rimbow won the Sweet Baby Jesus Christ Memorial Two-mile Race to Hell and Back in 13:49. Petra Williams won the women's division in 17:31.

Sweet Baby Jesus Christ Memorial Two-mile Race to Hell and Back/DFL

It took me 39:40 to mark the Sweet Baby Jesus Christ Memorial Two-mile Race to Hell and Back this morning. The race is scheduled to start at 4 p.m., CST.

Walt Webb's Fat Chicks are favored to defeat the Green Bay Packers, 126.08-122.83, in today's Democrat Football League Cooper Bowl. It is the first time since 2010 that the Packers have not played as favorites. The final score should be decided no later than about 6:45 this evening. All of our players are scheduled to start at either noon or c. 3 p.m.

35th Street Loop

It was nearly 11 p.m. when I started the four-mile 35th Street Loop. I jogged it in 44:19, with splits of 11:00, 11:17, 11:04, and 10:58, and felt great. As a consequence, there's a chance I won't sleep more than two or three hours between now and the 12th annual Christmas Hash Run, and the Green Bay Packers' Cooper Bowl match with the Fat Chicks.

OVERHEARD
"If your hands ain't greasy, you don't like ribs."
— southern guest on a PBS2, midnight cooking show, making me hungrier than two motherfuckers. If Craig's ran a graveyard shift, I swear to god I'd drive to DeValls Bluff right now

Burns Park Loop

I walked and jogged two laps of the Burns Park Loop this morning in 2:41:14, and felt fine all the way. The weather was perfect—cool, calm, and overcast. Kasey and I didn't golf yesterday. She said she was too hungover.

Burns Park Loop/Humpin' Hash

Ron and Elaine, Bill Brass, Y.T., and I walked the Burns Park Loop this morning in 1:43:44. My legs felt fine early, but dead after about an hour. I'm blaming the catfish. This evening I walked 2.5 miles with the Humpin' Hash on a pub crawl through the River Market. Lacey described it on Facebook as "the best 2.5 miles of my life." It was good. As result, I'm scheduled to golf in the morning with a lovely and entirely petepretty woman named Kasey. I mentioned her a couple of weeks ago. She was very drunk. We'll see.

Ghetto Cat Loop/Maple Street Loop/DFL

I walked the Ghetto Cat Loop this morning in 30:58. This should be a nearly perfect day to drive to Nashville and Hot Springs, and it was. I again overdid it on catfish, but this time with Dad in Hot Springs. This evening I walked the Maple Street Loop in 30:35.

The NFL started play in 1920. Since then, there have been 34 games in which a man has kicked six or more field goals (the record is eight). The DFL Packers kicker Justin Tucker became the 34th last night, when he kicked six to gave the Packers a 140.12-128.71 victory over the Cavemen, and help advance his team to its third consecutive Cooper Bowl (we'll play Walt Webb's Fat Chicks, 117.01-99.06 semifinal victors over Krup's Kids). Tucker kicked a 61-yarder in the final minute to give the Baltimore Ravens victory over the Detroit Lions, and put the NFL Packers in a position from which they control their fate; if they win their final two games, they're in the playoffs.

Levy Trail/Maple Street Loop/DFL

The Geezers walked 4.1 miles on the Levy Trail this morning. I tossed in a total of 1.6 miles by walking to and from our start-finish site, to cover a total of 5.7 miles in 1:37:17.  My legs are a little dead. Late this afternoon I walked the Maple Street Loop in 31:35.

The DFL Packers have to get seven points from Baltimore Ravens placekicker Justin Tucker tonight. In our system, kickers get 2 points for field goals of less than 30 yards, 3 for those of 30-49, and 4 for any over 50. They get 1 point for each extra point (the kick after touchdowns). Tucker has scored 7 or more points in 9 of Baltimore's 13 games this season. Based on that alone, I have a 69.2% chance of winning.

This is the NFL Packers' 94th season. Until yesterday, they had never returned from a deficit of 23 or more points to win. But yesterday afternoon, they trailed the Dallas Cowboys 26-3 at halftime, and won 37-36.

Levy Loop/Orange Street Loop/DFL

I jogged the Levy Loop this morning in 22:47, with splits of 11:27 and 11:20. It was impromptu that the effort turned nonstop. I planned to do my typical walk-jog, but felt so good by the time I got to the bend in Orange Street between my house and The T-Shirt Shop that I knew a chance for a good ol' fashioned jog-to-the-finish was in hand.

This evening I did intervals through the second mile of the Orange Street Loop, by alternating one-minute runs with one-minute walks. My runs were probably at about an eight-minute/mile pace. Maybe a little bit faster on the last couple. I walked and jogged the first and third miles. My splits were 11:45, 11:04, and 13:00. This was a good day. I'm beginning to feel sort of like I did in the fall of 2008 as I prepared for the 2009 Little Rock Marathon.

The DFL Green Bay Packers are in for extreme tension tomorrow night. We trail the Cavemen, 128.71-122.6. The Cavemen are through. We have a kicker going for the Balitmore Ravens In the Monday Night Football game, which has Baltimore at the Detroit Lions. Our kicker, Justin Tucker, is projected to score 6.98 points. Consequently, we are favored to win, 129.60-128.71. I'd call it a coin flip. The NFL Packers returned from a 26-3 halftime deficit to defeat the Dallas Cowfucks, 37-36. It was the biggest comeback in the Packers' 94-year history.

Burns Park/Maple Street Loop

I walked with Charley and Lou Peyton, and a woman named Leela, and man named Gary, all over Burns Park this morning. Lou and I walked alone together for about the last half. We were out for 2:23:46, and covered close to nine miles. We were getting it, so it might have been a bit more. I felt fantastic. Early this evening I walked the Maple Street Loop in 31:46.

Levy Trail/DFL

It occurred to me this morning that I hadn't so much as thought about my left hip in weeks. I felt good as I walked and jogged two miles on the Levy Trail in 26:18.

The Democrat Football League Green Bay Packers got off to a mediocre start in the Cooper Bowl semifinals on Thursday night. Two of our receivers in the Thursday Night Football game were projected to score a total of 27.07 points, but scored 21.38. All of the Cavmen's players will go Sunday. Yahoo®'s updated projected final score has the Cavemen winning, 115.99-109.50.

PROOF THAT NORTH KOREA NEEDS BETTER ENGLISH INTERPRETERS

The accused Jang brought together undesirable forces and formed a faction as the boss of a modern day factional group for a long time and thus committed such hideous crime as attempting to overthrow the state by all sorts of intrigues and despicable methods with a wild ambition to grab the supreme power of our party and state. ...

It is an elementary obligation of a human being to repay trust with sense of obligation and benevolence with loyalty. However, despicable human scum Jang, who was worse than a dog, perpetrated thrice-cursed acts of treachery in betrayal of such profound trust and warmest paternal love shown by the party and the leader for him. ..

Levy Trail

I walked the Levy Trail at lunchtime today in 30:44. I have a deep bruise near my left shin, just above my ankle, derived I reckon from a tree near Cantrell Blvd.

I PLAN TO STAB...
...the next person who says, "24-7."

Burns Park Loop/Humpin' Hash

Three other Geezers and I cut the Burns Park Loop short this morning. According to Ron Gimblet's watch, we walked 3.07 miles. I finished in 1:01:12 (there were still several icy sections). This evening I jogged and walked for 1:38:46 with the Humpin' Hash. We probably covered about 5 miles; each were very hard. My legs are beat up from a shit load of falls, all in about a three-hundred yard, straight-downhill stretch between Knopp Park and Cantrell Blvd. It sucked.

Maple Street Loop

I walked the Maple Street Loop tonight in 32:21. It's still cold, but the streets are nice. I'm hungry, and about to make cast-iron baked chicken thighs, with okra and carrots.

38th Street Loop/Levy Trail

I walked the 38th Street Loop this morning in 31:16. The streets are almost entirely clear of ice, except for a short stretch at the northern end of Orange. The sidewalk on 47th, where I fell yesterday, is still slick. This time I walked on the grass. That wasn't necessary on the Levy Trail. There were maybe twenty feet where I had to slow way down and sort of skate along late this afternoon as I walked two miles in 29:41. I underdressed. There was light, unscheduled snow falling, and a significant wind blowing from the north straight down the trail. That helped motivate me to walk just about as fast as I could.

Levy Loop/Hash

If any of the many loyal Pam's Boy readers see this before 3 p.m. CST, please turn the nearest available television to Fox. You'll see the Detroit Lions playing the Philadelphia Eagles in Philadelphia. I have watched football since 1967, have probably seen about three thousand games, but have never seen snow like this.*

I walked the Levy Loop this morning in 33:42. The roads are a little clearer, though I fell once (in full view of several cars on 47th Street).

I got to the Hash late, and then had to wait out the radio broadcast of the NFL Green Bay Packers' 22-21 victory over the Atlanta Falcons. It was big. It means the Packers are still in the race, and might be furthered inspired to get Aaron Rodgers back on the field. That could make a huge difference in the DFL Playoffs. We'll play in the semifinals next week. After the game, I jogged and walked for 33:43 through the Riverdale area, out by Rebsamen Park Golf Course. Cassandra Spicer set the run. Her Hash name is Merkin Mindy.

OVERHEARD
"I wasn't at last week's run."
—Patre, after she overheard Whole Come telling me how she'd missed me the last couple of months, and my telling Whole Come how disappointed I was when I finally returned last week and she wasn't there

*it's backed off a bit in the last five minutes. It's gone from bizarre to pretty

Levy Loop

It's 23°F at 11:11 a.m. There was enough traffic yesterday to turn the streets slushy. They are now consequently covered with ice, and as slippery as streets get. It took me 38:25 to walk the Levy Loop. It's a bright blue morning, with that inexplicable pastel hue of cold days. The few people I saw driving, or scraping their driveways, or sledding, all smiled and waved. I exchanged a few sentences with three of them, including my postman, and stopped to talk with a a man named Paul for about fifteen minutes. It had been more than two years since I'd seen him, and he told me he'd since learned we have at least two mutual friends—Tiny Tim Biggs of the Hash, and a fellow I worked with at the paper. Paul has a cat named Max, who I have occasionally stopped to pet for the last ten years, and a new one named Taj, who is also friendly, and one of the prettiest cats I've seen. They walked around us throughout our conversation.

OVERHEARD
"No, but I cain't say how glad I am that you called. Hell, I'd done  forgot all about the game."
—Travis Walker, whose telephone number is one digit different from Bob Marston's. I misdialed as I called Bob to discuss the SEC Football Championship Game. After Travis answered, I asked if he were watching the game. He said, in a hillbilly draw, he wasn't, for some reason he'd forgotten, but, by god, he was going to turn it on "rat now." I asked if he were Bob Marston (I thought for a moment he was Turd, trying to be funny). He laughed and gave me his OVERHEARD

PLEASE TELL ME WHAT THIS MEANS
"A dream is for those who sleep. I live mine."
—Pitbull, on a commercial for Dr. Pepper (I'm kidding, sort of. I know what Pitbull means in the same way I know what Rainwater means when he says, "The cupboard is out of ammunition."

35th Street Loop/Levy Loop

I walked the 35th Street Loop this morning in 58:10. It was relatively nice then, just wet and cold. Now there's ice and snow all over the place. Even Sam doesn't want out.

Heck, man, Levy is pure white. We got more snow than ice. I don't think anyone in town lost power. It was much more comfortable walking this afternoon than this morning. I walked the Levy Loop in 33:34, slowed by a few slippery spots, and cars driving too fast.

Orange Street Loop

I walked the Orange Street Loop late this afternoon in 45:05. It rained on me the last five minutes or so. It's turning miserable here. They're saying a shit load of ice is very likely tomorrow.

Burns Park Loop

I walked and jogged the Burns Park Loop this afternoon in 1:20:10. At 2:50 p.m., it's 73°F. I think the high for Friday and Saturday might be below freezing. There's a chance for an ice storm.

Levy Trail/DFL

Man, I ate two huge meals today, the first in Nashville, the next in Hot Springs. Lots of catfish and ham went down. I walked two miles on the Levy Trail tonight in 33:03.

All of the improbable long shots cashed for the Democrat Football League Green Bay Packers last night. It was incredible. Krupsaw's team held on to win 123.63-123.21. Goddamn Russellmania III won against all odds. The only way we'll have to play the seemingly unbeatable Complete Sellouts is if we make the Cooper Bowl.

Ridge Road Loop/DFL

I walked and jogged the Ridge Road Loop this morning 53:05.

The Green Bay Packers defeated the Capitol City Redskin, 98.82-64.12. We will get a bye through the first round of the playoffs, and then very likely get  the cow shit beat out of us by the Complete Sellouts in the semifinals. There is still a chance we we won't have to play the Sellouts until the Cooper Bowl, but that will require a couple of long shots to come through on Monday Night Football. Also, there's the extreme long shot that the Sellouts lose next week.

Levy Faster Than Two Motherfuckers 3K course/Hash/DFL

I walked a slightly longer version of the Levy Faster Than Two Motherfuckers 3K course this morning in 30:42. This evening I walked for 48:28 with Z Man at the Hash run way out in west Little Rock, not far from Pinnacle Mountain. There was a new nurse there. She seemed ideal at first sight, and remained so. She said she's scheduled to move away on Dec. 20, though seemed inclined to wait until the morning of Dec. 23, the day after my Christmas run. We'll see.

The Democrat Football League Green Bay Packers won, and are DFL regular-season champions for the first time. I'm delighted. Still, the Cooper Bowl is all that really counts.