Levy Trail

 Nine other Geezers and I walked on the Levy Trail this morning. I was out for 29:34.

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South late this afternoon in 34:36.

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY. ...Did a comment often repeated by Pam's Boy writer Rockamundo lead Matthew McConaughey to adopt the southern accent the contemptible motherfucker displayed on a TV commercial broadcast by NBC on Wednesday night, or does anyone suppose a meaningful person in his life at some point said, to paraphrase, "Would you please quit with this Hollywood crap? It's more contemptible than two motherfuckers, you know?"

Hash/Levy Trail South

I walked Levy Trail South in light, cold rain at lunchtime Thursday in 33:21. ...Last night, I was out for about two and a half hours on the annual Humpin' Hash Christmas run. ...They say the temperature will get down to 7 before daybreak tomorrow in a bizarre cold snap blowing in from the northwest. It won't get above freezing until Christmas Eve. Pipes will likely freeze across the Little Rock metro. Meanwhile, everyone in Texas is expected to perish. 

Levy Trail South/DFL

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 32:39. ...The DFL Green Bay Packers snuck into the playoffs but were creamed in the first round. In our lowest points output of the season, the Sherwood Shigallas crushed us to flakes, 105.18-75.32. ...The fat guy from The Office is apparently also a Green Bay Packers fan. In the LA Rams-at-Green Bay Monday Night Football telecast, he performed in a scripted pregame gig as a fat fuck from LA who is also a Packers fan. It lacked the intimacy of the impromptu deal he did in Georgia. In fact, it was kind of lame.

Oaklawn

 HOT SPRINGS—I walked for 38:12 to, through, and about the grounds of Oaklawn Racing Casino Resort before I wrote stories about the Poinsettia and Tinsel Stakes today. It was colder than two motherfuckers at the racetrack.

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 33:23.

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 34:47.

Levy Trail South/Oaklawn/Hash

 I wrote a total of twelve stories from Saturday, December 3, through Saturday, two days ago, so I was busy with work but otherwise somewhat lazy. I walked Levy Trail South mid-last week one late, cold afternoon. For the first time ever, with my iPhone, I interviewed a horseman while on the Levy Trail. On Friday, three days ago, I walked for close to an hour near the racetrack and Oaklawn's other facilities. Yesterday, I was out for about an hour and fifteen minutes with the Little Rock Hash House Harriers in southwest Little Rock.

PETE PERKINS

HOT SPRINGS — The best news related to opening day at Oaklawn Racing Casino resort came late in October on hospital grounds in Iowa.

Opening day itself for Oaklawn’s 68-day meet is today, and it features the $150,000 5 1/2-furlong Advent Stakes for two-year-old horses. It includes an Iowa-bred sensation named Tyler’s Tribe. The Advent post time is scheduled for 3:46 p.m.

The first race of Oaklawn’s 2022-23 season has a post-time set for 12:30 p.m.

Trainer Tim Martin’s and Tom Lepic’s Tyler’s Tribe, the 3-5 morning-line Advent favorite, is named for an eight-year-old leukemia survivor named Tyler Juhl who, with his tribe of family and friends on hand, rang a bell on the grounds of the University of Iowa Hospital on Oct. 24 to symbolize his cancer-free status after a two-year fight.

Lepic 69, is Juhl’s grandfather, and he, his fellow tribe members, and Tyler’s Tribe were among the brightest stories of the Breeders’ Cup early last month at Keeneland Race Course in Lexington, Ky.

“We feel so blessed for what we’ve gotten in kindness from all over the country,” Lepic said. “At the Breeders’ Cup, we were treated like royalty there. It was really something, but best of all, we have this young man who is cancer free. We had hundreds of people from Iowa go to the Breeders’ Cup just for the support.”

Undefeated in five previous runaway starts, Tyler’s Tribe bled on the lead of the $1 million Breeders’ Cup Juvenile Turf Sprint, and his 20-year-old rider Kylee Jordan pulled him up for a trot to the wire.

“Breaking out of the gate, he had so much speed for the first 200, 300 yards,” said Jordan, who rode eight winners at Oaklawn last season. “He was just cruising, and then he bled obviously, and I just eased him up.”

Followers of the tale of Tyler’s Tribe will see the start of its second chapter at Oaklawn, with many of his tribe in attendance.

“When people are fortunate to overcome such heartbreak and difficulties, that’s what life is about,” Oaklawn president Louis Cella said. “When you have the Advent race at Christmas time with great stories, it’s not just horse racing. It transcends horse racing. It brings a tear to the eye.”

Eight others are entered in the Advent, including Happy Is a Choice, second on the morning line at 9-2. Owned by Hooties Racing, Wss Racing, and 4G Racing, the son of Runhappy and maternal grandson of Afleet Alex is trained by John Ortiz. David Cabrera is listed to ride Happy Is a Choice.

“We’re ready to go,” Ortiz said. “We’ll see how he does with [Tyler’s Tribe].”

After one long look at the as-yet nameless yearling Tyler’s Tribe, Lepic, 69, called Martin, his longtime partner and Oaklawn regular.

“Tom sent me a picture and I went, ‘Wow. Yeah, I want you to go take a look at this horse’,” Martin, 60, said. “We went over there and we partnered up on him.”

They bought him for $34,000.

“We didn’t know if he was a bargain or not,” Martin said. “He was the sale topper. He was the highest one they sold, but before long, I looked at the horse, and I told Tom, ‘If we can get this horse in training, we can sell him for probably [$150,000 to $200,000]. This horse is unbelievable the way he looks.”

Tyler’s Tribe is set to start the Advent at 6 5-0-0 with earnings of $306,294. His connections said they were marveled as he progressed through his five starts at Prairie  Meadows in Altoona, Iowa.

He started with a 16-length win over a field of 10 at 4 1/2 furlongs on June 20. Next, Tyler’s Tribe won by 8 1/2 lengths in the 5 1/2-furlong Prairie Gold Juvenile Stakes in 1:03.64. At odds of 1-10, Tyler’s Tribe romped to a 12-length win in the 5 1/2 furlong Iowa Stallion Futurity in 1:04.18. He covered 6 furlongs in 1:09.83 and 1:09.74 to respective wins in the Freshman Stakes and the Iowa Cradle Stakes by a combined 21 1/2 lengths to complete his Prairie Meadows meet on Oct. 1.

“He is way above all the others I’ve trained,” said Martin, a native of Hardy but long a Hot Springs resident. “He’s way over the top. Other than the Breeders’ Cup, this horse has been the class. He hasn’t just beaten them. He’s beaten them [easily], and I hope the Advent’s the same way. I think he’s going to run big. Every time he runs, he’s just way the best.”

After Tyler’s Tribe’s opening-day sprint at Oaklawn, his connections sound confident he can go long. Thoughts of a Kentucky Derby pursuit are within their mindsets.

“I want to make sure this horse is good after the race, but we might try to bring him back for [the Grade III 1-mile-and-1/16th Southwest Stakes on Jan. 28] if he takes us there,” Martin said. “I really, really think he can stretch out.”

At least one thing seems certain. Wherever Tyler’s Tribe races, Tyler’s tribe will follow.

Cella agreed that as head of Oaklawn management he cannot cheer for particular horses. At least not aloud. As for Tyler’s Tribe, perhaps another way will suffice for many.

“We can cheer from our hearts,” Cella said.

Levy Trail North

 I walked Levy Trail North this morning in 34:43.

Levy Trail South

 I thought it would be sunny today. Instead, I walked through light rain as I completed Levy Trail South this morning in 34:38. ...The weather has become ideal for the Class AA championship game I will cover beginning at noon. Every football game played in the long history of sports fiction has occurred on cold gray days. I wish we could get a goddamn light snow flurry started.

Levy Trail

 Several other Geezers and I walked on the Levy Trail this morning. I was out for 47:16.

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 33:11.

UALR

 I walked through and around UALR at lunchtime today—for 36:37—to find that 26 buildings have been constructed on its campus since I graduated 39 years and 11 months ago. There were not nearly 26 buildings here when I was in school. By the way, I am at the Stephens Center to cover a UALR women's game for the newspaper. Unfortunately, the hot Swedish player I fell for in November 2017 has run out of eligibility. ...My memory is not as good as I once, perhaps, overrated it. Here is what I wrote of the "hot Swedish player" after UALR's 86-57 victory over Memphis on Sunday, Nov. 12, 2017: By the way, UALR's first-year junior forward Yanina Inkina bubbles over with pete-prettiness. She's a 6-2 blonde from Minsk, Belarus, who plays for the Belarusian national team. I interviewed her after the game and figure at least half of UALR's students, faculty, and staff already have a thing for her.

OVERHEARD

“I’m really glad that I came here. It’s a good school with a good basketball program, and I know for sure that Coach Foley is going to help me to be a better player.”

—UALR basketball player Yanina Inkina

Levy Trail North

 I walked Levy Trail North this morning in 31:51. ...I spent right at $55 yesterday for a ribeye, oysters, and shrimp. My goal is to eat all of it—grilled, fried, and steamed—as I watch football on Thanksgiving. I might bake a potato, too. ...The above is Mavis (Second Dog) Stapleton singing the Staple Singers' I'll Take You There.

Levy Trail South/Oaklawn Sports

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 29:23. This was a bit faster than I will be willing to go very often, at least for now. By the way, the cat is no longer up the tree. ...With one day to go in my tenth week of sports betting, my Oaklawn Sports account is $13.18 in the hole. I won 90 cents last night with a $1 bet on Kansas City and the LA Chargers to combine for more than 52 points. They scored a total of 57 points. I won when the Chiefs scored a touchdown with 31 seconds left to play. ...Tonight, I have bet a $1 parlay, which means I will turn $1 into $3.30 if San Franciso outscores Arizona by 11 or more points and those teams combine to score 43 or more points. So, I need San Fran to cover the 10-point spread and San Fran to beat the over-under of 42 points. So far, I think I'm at .500 for two parlays. They are the sportsbook equivalent of exacta bets in racing.

Levy Trail Loop/Levy Trail South

I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 31:41. Two minutes away from my house, as I approached the house from which a dog nearly hung himself or herself on a chain over a seven-foot fence a few years ago, I heard a cat meowing with a very steady and loud beat. I stopped to try to look through the c. 1/8th inch partitions between the fence boards. There were two dogs, including the one on the chain I helped rescue, but I could not see the cat. Half an hour later, the cat was still wailing as I headed home. I got the cop car and drove to examine outside the house. The cat was perhaps thirty feet up the tree and way out of reach of even a schoolboy tree climber. So, I drove to the Levy fire department and described the situation to Captain Simpson, who asked for the house's address. After I gave it to him, he said he would do what he could. By the way, on my walk, I saw one of the two feral cats from last summer. It looks as if someone has adopted it. ...On Friday, I walked the Levy Trail Loop in a little over 34 minutes.

Levy Trail 5K

 I walked the Levy Trail 5K this morning in 50:39. I went through three miles in 49:17

Levy Trail Loop/Oaklawn Sports

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop this morning in 32:59. ...Tonight, I bet $1 on Washington and Philadelphia to combine to score more than the 42-point over/under. ...The teams reached a total of 43 points with 14:54 left in the fourth quarter. Consequently, I am now a mere $14.50 in the hole after exactly nine weeks of rabid gambling.

Levy Trail North/Hash/Oaklawn Sports

 HOT SPRINGS—I walked for about an hour with Hashers this afternoon on the Hangover Run at Hashfest. This morning, I walked Levy Trail North in 31:03. ...After my loss Thursday, I am down $16.37. I have risked $1 on the Los Angeles Chargers to cover a +7.5-point spread tonight against San Franciso.

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South this 40°F and windier-than-two-motherfuckers morning in 31:39.

Levy Trail Loop

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop through a steady drizzle this morning in 32:18.

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 33:31. ...As for tonight and Oaklawn Sports, I like the Atlanta Falcons to cover the spread as the 2.5-point favorites over the Carolina Panthers. Once again, this household will risk $1.00.

I PLAN TO STAB. ...whichever Democrat created the cliche, "Defund the Police," and the first Republican who failed to understand, "Black Lives Matter," two people who allowed irrationality and illogic to mar their parties.

QUESTION OF THE DAY. ...In your experience, has an above-average percentage of pit bull owners you've known been prone to anger?*

*I have known three, and they were frequently mad as hell, including my next-door neighbor who lives in John Lukas' former house and yells at his girlfriend a lot.

Levy Trail South/Oaklawn Sports

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 33:13. ...My Oaklawn Sports pot is down $15.33 after a profit last night of 90 cents thanks to the Baltimore Ravens. ...Surprisingly, my lottery number missed.

Levy Trail Loop/Joe Report

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop this morning in 32:18. ...I was stunned to have not won the $1.2 billion lottery drawing on Saturday night. There is no way the numbers I turned in will lose two drawings in a row, so I will dig deeply for two more dollars. I will then turn it over to the old Asian lady at the Shell station across from what used to be Pizza Hut but is now a Popeye's Fried Chicken. I will email the number of tonight's winning ticket to my preferred subscribers. ...I have not seen Joe since I drove away at 11:45 a.m. yesterday (Sunday). It is now 2:05 p.m. Monday. He usually shows up about ten minutes after I post a Joe Report. Do you suppose Marshall calls him? ...Joe knocked on the front door at 4:37 p.m.

Hash/Oaklawn Sports

 I ran for somewhere in the neighborhood of forty-five minutes on Janine's Little Rock Hash House Harrier run at lunchtime today. Afterward, I raced an official fundraising Fleet Feet Beer Mile in 28:42. I missed a couple of marks and probably walked more like a mile and a half. One of the race officials, who I dated for several weeks in the fall of 2004, was flabbergasted I had no telephone in my pants. She said, "What if they need you at work?" Somehow, the three women running the show let me race without signing the obligatory heart-attack waiver, which requires a telephone in this new world, the one in which the Green Bay Packers lose to the New York Giants, New York Jets, and Detroit Lions in the same Goddamn Season. ...My Oaklawn Sports losses rose to $16.25 with Philly's loss last night, meaning I will likely have to hold up liquor stores and minimarts for a while. Fortunately, though it is perfectly legal to rob people in Levy, I forgot to bet Sunday Night Football.

Levy Trail South/Oaklawn Sports

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 33:49. ...My pot is down $15.25 after about seven weeks of serious gambling. Today, I will bet $1 on Philly to beat Houston. Philly's pitcher has a slight advantage, plus I kind of want a Game 7.

Levy Trail South/Oaklawn Sports

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 33:20. ...With $5.75 in my Oaklawn Sports pot, I bet $1 on the Phillies to win tonight (Thursday, Nov. 3). Last night, bettors reacted as if Philly could not lose, so the odds worked well for me, considering the Astros clearly started the best of two starters. So far today, everyone has loaded up on Justin Verlander, ignoring his subpar postseason starts. His ERA this fall is a bit over 7.20. The Philly starter Noah Syndergaard has an ERA this postseason of 1.69. My dollar will return something like $2.80. If the odds were even, I would take Verlander. Still, they are not. Besides, I would like to cheer for Philly at least once more this fall. ...Also, with the Powerball over $1 billion, I bought a $2 ticket today for the first time since Jan. 11, 2016. As before, I went with the jersey numbers of the Green Bay Packers top four leading career rushers and top three passers. Most of my friends know how well that paid off for me six and a half years ago.

Levy Loop/Oaklawn Sports

 I walked the Levy Loop this morning in 33:25. ...By the way, the Green Bay Packers came back enough to not get their butts absolutely kicked, but they still lost by 10 points, so I lost my $2 bet. After a terrible selection on Monday night football, my $20 investment is now worth $4.84. Today, I bet $1 on Houston. Its starter Cristian Javier has been quite a bit more reliable and, momentum aside, I believe Houston is the better team. Still, what a home-field advantage for the Phillies.

Oaklawn Sports-Joe's Silver Bullet Bet of a LIfetime

 When I first signed up for Oaklawn Sports, my first-lifetime chance to make legal bets on football (and baseball and all the rest), I worried about my general proclivity to addiction. After two months of turning $20 into $7.84 with a run of steady betting, I believe I might have a chance of not handing a racetrack in Hot Springs my massive fortune. You know, maybe. ...Joe's Silver Bullet Bet of a Lifetime for today is to bet $2 and to take the Buffalo Bills to give up 10.5 or more points to the Green Bay Packers on Sunday Night Football. Kickoff is scheduled for 5:20 p.m. Pacific on NBC: The Packers suck dicks. All week, I have read pantless experts write Green Bay will make the playoffs. It will not. The Packers will spend the rest of the season, including tonight, sucking men's dicks. That, in itself, is fine. I love them however they choose to behave. They could force hundreds of Koreans to stampede each other to death or crack the Speaker of our House of Representatives husband's skull with a hammer, and I would love them (not because of those acts, but rather for a lifetime of Sunday afternoon entertainment). Still, the Buffalo Bills will score however many points they want against my favorite goddamn motherfucking sons of shit-eating whore bitches who have decided not to play football this season. They will get started tonight at 5:20 Pacific, 7:20 Central. ...I fell asleep long before the Packers' 27-17 loss to Buffalo was complete and guess I should be happy I lost two motherfucking dollars. However, I am not.

Robinson

RUSSELLVILLE — I walked for 36:22 at Robinson High School way out on Arkansas 10 on Friday night. By the way, my latest great infatuation is for a Robinson athletic trainer. In truth, I went kind of nuts for her five or six or perhaps seven years ago, but last night, she drove a four-wheeler to the edge of the field as I walked from George Stadium and said, "It was nice to see you again, Pete. I hope you'll be back this season." I guess she reads the paper. There is no way she and I will ever date, but I live for brushes like this one. ...It rained far too hard all day today to walk any more than around Thone Stadium for the Arkansas Tech game. Here's the story I wrote:

PETE PERKINS

RUSSELLVILLE — The meaningfulness of this game-winning field goal was clear the moment it banked in.

A rain-soaked Thone Stadium crowd of 1,104 and a sideline manned by approximately 100, including players, coaches, staff, and cheerleaders wrapped in emergency ponchos erupted with delight when senior kicker Jesus Zizumbo’s 44-yard field-goal attempt at the fourth-quarter buzzer bounced off the right upright and over the crossbar to give Arkansas Tech a 22-21 Great American Conference victory over the Southwestern Oklahoma Bulldogs on Saturday.

The field goal was the 40th of Zizumbo’s career and a Tech record.

“I’m just happy we won the game,” Zizumbo said. “We needed this win. I don’t really like looking at records. All I want is for my kicks to fall in. If they do that, I’ve done my job.”

Late in the game, it seemed unlikely Zizumbo would get a chance.

Tech (4-5, 4-5 GAC) was out of timeouts when its defense stopped Southwestern freshman running Gerald Palmer for a 1-yard loss on 4th-and-1 at the Tech 39 with 1:16 left in the game.

Tech was 60 yards from the end zone. After a first down on an 8-yard run by senior back Devontae Dean, Tech faced 3rd-and-9 from its 46, when senior quarterback Jack Grissom completed a 16-yard pass to sophomore receiver Mason Ross.

“He doesn’t drop passes,” Grissom said. “He’s very reliable.”

Ross made it sound simple.

“I watch the ball all the way in,” he said. “We emphasize that every day in practice, so I think it’s very important.”

After a 3-yard run by Dean and a spike left time for one more play, onto Buerkle Field marched Tech’s field-goal unit, including junior deep snapper Garrett Scott and holder Aaron Winn.

Winn said he could feel the anxiety.

“We practice that mayday situation every week, just in case something like this happens,” Winn said. “It was routine, but at the time when it’s an actual game, you have some pressure on you.”

Winn said he watched through a jumble of linemen as the kick headed right and struck the upright. He said he figured it had missed. Zizumbo, 5-9, 225, was knocked on top of him, and Winn hoped to see a flag on the field for roughing the kicker.

Zizumbo said he never watches his kicks. He instead listens for the crowd’s response to present results.

“He looked at that one, I can tell you that,” Winn said.

This kick bore watching. As it rose above the 22 special-teamers in play, it became obvious it was pushed. The football traveled straight and right from Zizumbo's foot until it hit the upright on a direct line. Luck then came into play, as sudden and violent deceleration leads to unpredictable outcomes. In this case, the ball rotated left and maintained adequate momentum to flutter over the crossbar before it fell onto Tech's artificial turf.

An insightful diagnosis of this game-winner was unnecessary for Tech Coach Kyle Shipp.

“The snap and hold looked good to me,” Shipp said. “As long as the kick went in, it doesn’t really matter. I’ll watch it on film tomorrow to see if it was perfect or not, but I’ll take it any way we can get it.”

Southwestern (3-6, 3-6) had turned a 14-10 halftime lead into 21-10 on Palmer’s 1-yard touchdown run with 12:09 left in the third quarter, but Grissom’s 39-yard touchdown run on Tech’s next series cut it to 21-16. Zizumbo, who had earlier missed a 20-yard field goal attempt, missed the extra point.

“When you miss, you have to forget about it,” Zizumbo said. “Life goes on after a kick.”

“I don’t think I’ll say anything to him about those misses,” Shipp said.

Zizumbo’s 23-yard field goal midway through the third tied the Tech career field-goal record of 39 set by Pitor Stychen from 1993-96.

The record-breaker took care of everything else for Tech.

“We practice that all the time,” Grissom said. “We were ready for it.”

Levy Trail

Several other Geezers and I walked the Levy Trail this morning. I was out for a little over an hour and thirty-five minutes. 

Levy

 I walked around Levy this morning for 34:20. Afterward, I sat with Joe on the planter under my den window when the big black dog came jogging up. Heretofore, the dog, a girl, has only approached at a fucking dead sprint. Joe did the ol' arched-back routine with a bit of a hiss as a warning, but he seemed no more than slightly apprehensive. They sat and looked at each other until I drove away to buy a bag full of booze as an elopement gift. This dog has only appeared in the mornings, making me hopeful she has a keeper somewhere nearby. I have begun to admire her.

Levy Trail Loop

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop in 32:20. ...Nearly unbelievably, the Levy Trail kittens made their first showing in a little over three weeks. They have grown quite a bit and have apparently moved into a house just east of the tree near which they roamed. ...The big black dog ran across the street to see me as I came in from a haircut. He really wanted in my house but sat when I asked him and stayed put until I closed the door behind me. He has a mean-looking brown face.

Levy Trail North

 I walked Levy Trail North this morning in 32:54. ...There was a huge, mean-looking dog who charged at me after yesterday's walk and before today's. Once he arrived, he acted shy both times, as if he weren't sure if he wanted me to pet him. Someone has put a pink collar on this black behemoth. Joe and I are confused.

Levy Trail Loop

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop this morning in 31:26. I had to go coat and gloves.

Levy Trail Loop

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop this morning in 31:46. This was my first walk in gloves since a while back.

OVERHEARD "Tell 'im to eat some Jello Pudding, motherfucker." — fellow who made reference to an early-1980s Eddie Murphy parody of Bill Cosby as that fellow walked from Kroger. No one other than the fellow and Rockamundo seemed to think the comment was funny

Levy Trail South

SEARCY—I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 31:47 and am now at Harding's First Security Stadium for the first time since 2008. Harding will play Henderson State. Kickoff is scheduled for about eight minutes from now. ...Henderson won the game, somewhat of an upset, 15-14. It was an easy, pleasant story to write. Henderson's coach, Scott Maxfield, is an enjoyable man, similar to but far less Trumpian than the fellow one of my readers met in faraway Monticello, Arkansas, many years ago.

Levy Trail Loop

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop this morning in 33:23.

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 33:50.

Hash

I walked for nearly fifty minutes from Zach's and Lacey's house with the Hash this afternoon.

Burns Park Championship Course

Ed and I played Burns Park Championship Course this morning and early afternoon. I scored 94. 

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 30:42.

Levy Trail South

I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 32:16. With about a mile and a half left, I saw a man watching television on a smartphone as he walked. He had a plastic thing wrapped around his neck that held the phone at about chin level, tilted slightly up. Heck, I might buy that sort of getup. There's no way to know what the Levy Trail kittens would have thought of it since they have gone missing. 

Henderson State

 ARKADELPHIA—I think it is odd that I walked for 36:22 around the Henderson State campus and athletic complex this afternoon with a forlorn hope that I would somehow see the short-haired blonde whose appearance I immediately fell for in about January 2006.

Levy Trail Loop

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop this morning in 29:48. This was my first walk in a sweatshirt since last winter. According to weather.com, it is currently 53°F. My hands hurt a little at first. ...The kittens made no appearance.

Levy Trail South

 One of the two Levy Trail kittens showed up today. I saw it as it sprinted across the trail west toward Camp Robinson Rd., as I walked past en route to my house to complete Levy Trail South in 29:46. These cats are based about a block and a half south of 42nd Street (which I use to drive to Kroger). Their apparent play center is at or near a medium-sized tree with three trunks on the east side of the trail. I haven't seen their mother, but their safety area is seemingly a particularly shady spot in overgrown shrubbery grown through a chainlink fence on the edge of someone's backyard.

Levy Trail Loop

I walked the Levy Trail Loop this morning in 32:34. The two new Levy Trail kittens look like squirrels from a distance. That's what I thought they were today until they started fighting. My best guess is they are two weeks old.

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South late this morning in 30:27. The $25 step counter I purchased from Amazon said I took 4,023 steps, but that count is somewhat inaccurate. I think I read three articles on published research that estimated a daily walk of 3,800 steps at a minimum of 112 a minute would decrease the risk of dementia by 64%. My recent count of steps a minute has varied from c. 110 to 130. Today, three counts averaged about 120, yet the average steps a minute measured by this gauge were 133. My guess is that I took about 3,700 steps. Who knows. ...I saw the third set of Levy Trail feral kittens this morning. I am tempted to attempt to snare one. ...I walked out to see the kittens at about 5 p.m. They ran off. This could take a while.

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 30:28.

Red Loop/DFL

 I don't know what the Red Loop record is. Still, I am confident I crushed it this morning with a time of 31:40. Once again, I gleefully write that the University of Michigan and the Ivy League have nothing on Levy regarding cultural diversity. I walked past a black man and a Hispanic woman screaming at each other on their front porch at 6:12 a.m., long before daybreak. We should open Levy College and charge $40,000 a semester. ...The DFL Green Bay Packers defeated the Complete Sellouts, 105.15-75.95. The NFL Packers beat the Chicago Bears, 27-10.

OVERHEARD "Why don't you move, then?"—one Levy scholar to another

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY... Where did the culinary idea of crinkle cut come from, and why did anyone come up with it? With french fries, I might see it, since the crinkle cut offers a potato more surface area to soak up grease. I don't know about carrots. What's the point there? Finally, how do people crinkle cut things? Do they make crinkled knives, and can I get one on Amazon?

Levy Trail North

 I walked Levy Trail North this morning in 34:10.

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South at lunchtime today in 35:49.

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South this cool morning in 35:39. Dogs won the Mammal Game, 3-0.

Levy Trail Loop

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop late this morning in 35:22.

Red Loop/Green Bay Packers

 The Seattle Tennis Balls defeated the Dever Broncos, 17-16, on Monday Night Football. Theirs was a colorful performance. ...I walked the Levy Loop late this morning in 34:14. ...Though a one-person survey taken several years ago indicated Pam's Boy readership, like readership of everything on earth and I, does not care about anyone's fantasy results but their own. Regardless, if for nothing but my files, the Green Bay Packers won their DFL season-opener against Wreckin Crew, 82.39-71.40. It was the fewest points the Packers have scored in a win since the DFL began in 1997. The only DFL team we would have defeated was the one we played. The NFL Green Bay Packers were defeated by the Minnesota Vikings, 23-7. 

UAPB

 PINE BLUFF—I walked for 44:40 before watching UAPB's probable blowout of North American University, a fifteen-year-old school from the Houston suburb Stafford. North American plays as an independent in the National Association of Intercollegiate Athletics (NAIA), the lowest level of football played by four-year schools. I'll put the over-under points differential at 50 in favor of the home team. ...UAPB won, 76-3. UAPB began football in 1916, and this is the fifth largest points differential since then. In 1936, the school outscored Philander-Smith College of Little Rock, 85-0, for its most lopsided victory. Also noteworthy, Elijah Pitts played for Philander-Smith in the late 1950s and early 1960s. He was a borderline star for the Green Bay Packers during the Vince Lombard era. He later was the lead writer for the Trash of the Little Rock Hash House Harriers, known then as Eli Pitts. He was the Trash writer who was shot in the shoulder by a National Guardsman as he made a drink for himself on Bourbon Street. You know, the one who didn't know Hurricane Katrina had struck and thus wondered what all the touristy fuss was over New Orleans, what with all the water everywhere and trees blown all the fuck over the roads. 

Levy/Red Loop

 I walked the Red Loop this morning in 34:10. Yesterday, I walked from my house to the COGIC on the Levy Trail and back on 38th and Orange Streets in 15:48.

I PLAN TO STAB. ...the next adult who acts as if their feelings are hurt when I can't remember their name. This threat will expire when I can no longer remember my own name. Otherwise, I would become similar to those two fucks from Canada.

Hash

 Cassandra "Who the hell is Cassandra" Ticer and her husband Nathan set a 1.8-mile Hash run from their house near Dickey-Stephens Park this afternoon. I was out for 34:34.

Episcopal Collegiate/Arkansas-Pine Bluff

 PINE BLUFF—I walked for a total of 51:46 from Golden Lion Stadium around the UAPB campus before UAPB's football game against Lane College. ...Last evening, I walked for about forty minutes before the Smackover Buckaroo's 8-6 victory over the Episcopal Collegiate Wildcats. Smackover was the hometown of Clyde "Smackover" Scott. Scott won the silver medal at the 1948 Summer Olympics in the 110-meter hurdles. He was given his nickname while a running back for the NFL's Philadelphia Eagles. We had an old sports copy editor at the paper named Mike Marino, who grew up in Pennsylvania. He said that, as a teenager, he assumed Scott got his nickname as a player prone to smacking over the line of scrimmage. ...By the way, to hell with the football team. It was worth my trip to watch UAPB's Marching Magical Music Machine of the Mid-South. What a grand halftime show.

Maumelle

I walked for 38:42 near Maumelle High School this evening before I watched Maumelle beat Batesville, 35-0. 

Hash

 We were out for about fifty-five minutes yesterday on a walk with the Little Rock Hash Harriers from Rebsamen Tennis Center.

Levy Trail Loop

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop this morning in 36:46. ...Here is a generalization based on thirty-five and a half years of runs, jogs, and walks through Levy: Poor people of any age will turn to look at every hint of anyone or anything approaching them from behind. No one else does, except for children, unless the person or thing behind them is making a shit load of noise.

The City Museum/Hash

 I was out with the Little Rock Hash House Harriers from the Big Dam Bridge for around an hour and a half this evening. There were only twenty or so along, and I had enormous fun. ...I took three of my four nieces and my one nephew to the St. Louis City Museum yesterday. I cannot count this as exercise. However, it was not a museum at all. It was a vast five-story maize built into the remainder of a downtown shoe factory. It was three hours of unending panic as I failed to keep sound track of three girls aged eight to thirteen. My somewhat brilliant fifteen-year-old nephew could not imagine my worry. The ten- and thirteen-year-old girls are destined to break hearts left and right. Perhaps their apparent kindness will mitigate the damage. ...The eight-year-old is a nearly magical wonder of maturity. Her name is, no shit, Jamima, as in the famous pancake aunt. She is overweight and likes to make funny faces, but she is also the Perkins superstar. I cannot wait to again sit alone with her at 6:30 on a Sunday morning and have her say, "I thought you were my dad, with glasses and a hat, sitting by yourself in that chair with a computer in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other."

I PLAN TO STAB. ...the next person who says "...selected shorts" for a collection of short stories.

Red Loop

 I walked the Red Loop this morning in 35:43. ...Late this afternoon, I drove by Red's house on a way I often take at rush hour. Red's roommate Helen was outside with her somewhat tiny bulldog-looking dog, and I slowed to ask her how Red was doing. She told me Red (known to her as Sammy) has started to slow down with her age, 14, and does not go out very often anymore.

Burns Park Tournament Course

 Ed and I played Burns Park Tournament Course. I scored 90, with nines of 41 and 49. ...My little half-brother John has multiple myeloma. I will drive the rocket car to St. Louis to see him tomorrow. I also look forward to seeing Lindsey and their children Evangeline, 17, Shepherd, 15, Clementine, 12, Juniper, 10, and Jamima, 8 (I have been working on those so that, hopefully, I will be able to call them by name tomorrow at c. 1 p.m., except that they all go by nicknames Eva, Shep, Clem, Juni, and Mimi. Fuck.). ...Hold on. Wait a minute. I went from this morning until three minutes ago, at 6:26 p.m., thinking today was Friday. Now I know it's Thursday. I will drive the rocket car to St. Louis the day after tomorrow, Saturday, which gives me an extra twenty-four hours to memorize Eva, 17, Shep, 15, Clem, 12, Juni, 10, and Mimi, 8. I have to give Richard credit. He had that all down three years before he died.

Red Loop

 I planned to walk the 2.2-mile Red Loop this morning. However, I was dressed in the clothes I plan to wear for the day, and it started to rain hard, so I cut the walk short. I was out for 24:15.

Levy Trail Loop

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop this morning in 37:11. The plumber on 34th Street has a new cat, a big tabby who looks kinda like Joe.

HIndman Park

 I set, I believe, a successful run this morning for the Little Rock Hash House Harriers. About twenty people showed. However, I used the bowl my mother bought when we lived in Fairbanks, Alaska, to hold cold-boiled shrimp cocktail sauce (I think [hope] if you google cold-boiled shrimp, you will find that is what shrimp was called in the 1960s and '70s, back when people boiled raw shrimp for about 75 seconds to make what was then called cold-boiled shrimp. It was, and in Levy, as of this morning, still is, then dropped in ice and thoroughly chilled). I cooked three pounds of it this morning, and it was much celebrated. However, I put the cocktail sauce in that old, old bowl. I dropped it right before I drove John (Finger Picken' Good) Kelly home, and it broke into c. 54 pieces. I picked them all up and threw them into a particularly smelly garbage can.

Rats. I did not show it, but I wish I had not broken that bowl.

Hindman Park

 I spent a sentiment-filled hour and a half setting a run for the Little Rock Hash House Harriers on the dormant Hindman Park Golf Course this morning. Unfortunately, I no longer know a pretty Hasher gullible* enough to think I need her help setting a Hash run.

*in truth, I have never known a pretty Hasher who resided in this category, unless you count A-Mac

Burns Park Tournament Course

 Ed and I played the Burns Park Tournament Course this morning. I scored a 93, with nines of 47 and 46. It is almost pleasant today.

Levy

 I walked the first part of the Ghetto Cat Loop before I remembered an appointment I would be embarrassed to miss. So, I scooted back home on 38th and Orange Streets to complete a 14-minute, 38-second walk.

I PLAN TO STAB...The next person who stops three or fewer feet after they have walked from a grocery store door for any reason other than to prevent injury or death. If they do so to put or take something from their pants or purse, they will die in boiling oil, the selfish motherfuckers. By the way, the same goes for people who put cash into their pants or purse or balance their checkbooks before they have made way for the car behind them at an automatic teller. Pull forward ten feet, you cocksuckers.

Levy

 In my search for the neighborhood cat Red, I found a new loop that could possibly become a standard. It starts on the Levy Trail and extends to a hilly lap around the apartments in which John Kelly once lived. Those apartments, by the way, now have the filthiest grounds I have seen. Trash was strewn everywhere. It looked almost fake, like a Hollywood set. The loop also included a dog who scared the heck out of me. That moment was highlighted by an overweight, cigarette-smoking, sixty-five-year-old robe-clad woman who rushed out to scream at the fifty-pound powderkeg. I had to look hard for Red. Still, at the last moment, I saw her peer toward me from his house as he napped on top of a recliner placed very near a front window. The Red Loop took me 37:34.

Levy

 I walked from my house to 47th St. and back on the Levy Trail at lunchtime today. It took me 13:40.

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 34:44. The air in Levy is a bit drier, I believe. ...The biographer David McCullough died yesterday. At 11:44 a.m., I am watching a "...for the hour" interview with him on the Charlie Rose Show from 2005. I found it on utube. It makes me wonder whether Charlie, if allowed, could still do the show. This has to be the best set for an interview program I have seen. ...I can't speak for tortillas, but twenty-two years ago, I ate a fair order of fried gizzards from a supermarket in Sacramento.

Levy Trail South

 My idea this morning was to walk two miles without sweating. It was a bad one. I walked the Levy Trail Loop in 36:56.

Maumelle

 I walked 2.1 miles with Ron, Elaine, Kayla, and Jayme around Lake Willistein late this morning. We were out for about 48 minutes.

Levy

 I walked on the Levy Trail to the COGIC and then back home along 37th and Orange Streets. It took me 16:36.

Burns Park Tournament Course

 Ed and I played the back nine of Burns Park Tournament Course this morning. I was nine-over through the first five holes but played the final four in three-over, with a birdie on No. 16. ...For the first time in several days, I drove the '09 Impala. Right off, driving up Orange Street Hill from my house, I wondered what was wrong with the car. It seemed to kind of struggle up the hill. Then, on I-40, it didn't want to accelerate. The light bulb went off after another minute. "Oh, yeah," I said to myself. "This car is fine. It's just the first time this week you haven't driven the 5.7-liter, 400-horsepower police rocket car."

Burns Park Championship Course

 John, Ed, and I played Burns Park Championship Course this morning. It was like a death march. Nevertheless, I was pleased to score about 91 from the silver tees.  I used 33 putts and birdied No. 17 with a pitching wedge from about 105 yards to five inches. ...John said Joe the cat begins prayers like this: "Listen up, God. If you know what's good for you,...."

Lakewood Lake No. 2

I walked with a handful of other Geezers this morning for an hour and eight minutes out and back from Lakewood Lane No. 2. 

Hash

 We ran from the pavilion in Boyle Park where Leah Thorvilson nearly renamed me Fagamundo eighteen summers ago. I don't believe anyone who was there still runs with us. Maybe Kayce, but I forgot to ask. I was out for about an hour. By the way, I would probably marry Abby on the very outside chance that would end well. ...I am seriously considering publishing A Different Closet on Pam's Boy chapter by chapter. Maybe someone would like to read it. Who knows? I don't believe any publishing house would ever accept it. ...Oh, thanks to whichever of my readers emailed the photo of the Sacramento cat.

River Trail

 Ron, Elaine, Jayme, Kayla, and I walked about 1.25 miles in 1:08:42 on the River Trail from Cook's Landing late this morning. There was a lot of standing around involved. I was teased greatly about my new-to-me, five-year-old rocket-like cop car.

QUESTION OF THE DAY...What does anyone think about this paragraph from early in the final of 33 chapters in A Different Closet? There were a few days like this each August. Cool wind from the northwest had blown away the dankness, and high clouds diffused into a translucent sheet that spread over the sky to leave a breezy and dry, bright white afternoon. It served as an advertisement for fall. These sorts of days reminded Keith of football, even now, as he walked through waves of roaring cheer to a microphone set between him and the last crowd he would address. Thousands of people sat or stood on a panorama of shiny grass, which opened like an Asian fan above him and rose to the Art Museum a quarter of a mile away. Still, St. Louis was a baseball town, and he could see it—Cardinal jerseys and shirts and caps were everywhere—and smell it in the air filled with an aroma of charcoal and charred meat and streaked by wafts of smoke.

Burns Park Championship Course

John, Ed, and I played the back nine of Burn Park Championship Course from the silver tees this morning. I scored 45, with 1 par, 7 bogies, and 1 double. I think I used 15 putts. ...By the way, I understand why my California readers might not want to post photos of cats.

Hash

 Yesterday evening, I walked and jogged for about an hour and a half with the Little Rock House Harriers from a house near War Memorial Park in Hillcrest. It was the most fun I have had at a Hash run in a while. ...The following is fairly accurate I believe. Best I can figure, I had spent a total of $13,900 on the six previous cars I have purchased throughout my lifetime. As of about 11:45 a.m. today, that total now stands at $28,400 for seven vehicles. I bought a 2017 Police Pursuit Dodge Charger from White Hall, Ark., on govdeals.com. It was driven as a personal car by a White Hall city administrator over a mere 62,000 miles. I nearly broke my neck accelerating on a test drive last week. Here's what it looks like: 

By the way, if you click on this picture, it will blow up a bit. It is lovely inside and out and has a long list of options, most of which are beyond my ability to understand. Also, it will impress some that it gets a surprising 24 feet to the gallon. I am pleased to have bought it for $15,400, or about $10,000 less than any other worthwhile 2017 equivalent. I hope it lasts the rest of my life.

Maumelle

 Ron, Elaine, Kayla, Jayme, and I walked around Lake Willistein in Maumelle this morning for 1:00.40. We then ate at a nearby pizzeria. Kayla and Jayme are funnier than two motherfuckers who like to laugh a lot. Among hilarious scenarios discussed were the invention of forks and the way by which all experts, regardless of subject,  love to say, "See, I told you so." It was suggested that experts, regardless of age, should have to adopt the tone of seventy-five-year-old people as they say on National Public Radio, "We tried to tell them kids, but did they listen? Noooooo, of course they didn't. Those damn kids.". ...If I can figure out how to put pictures on blogger.com, why can't everyone? I wanna see them goddamn California kittens and cats. ...By the way, this is a time for my California-based friends to subscribe to mlb.tv. It will allow them to watch nearly every Astros and White Sox game on TV for no more than peanuts.

Burns Park Tournament Course/Levy Trail

 I walked on the Levy Trail to 47th Street and back late this morning in 13:10. Ordinarily, par for that route would be about eleven minutes, so this was somewhat easy. ...I don't understand why anyone cares about home run derbies. What is the difference between them and batting practice? Interestingly, one will be used as a nine-inning tiebreaker for tonight's all-star game (if necessary). I guess I will care about that one (if necessary). By the way, I do recognize my dislike for home run derbies is similar to mine for boneless and skinless fried chicken sandwiches and nuggets. I acknowledge this makes me no better than anyone who likes those things, merely different. As in, you know, God bless Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and Donald Trump. ...Yesterday, Ed and I played the front nine of Burns Park Tournament Course. I believe my score was about 50, give or take one stroke, or maybe two.

Burns Park Championship Course

 John, Ed, and I played Holes 3-10 on Burns Park Championship Course this morning. I didn't feel particularly well and walked off halfway through No. 11.

Hash

I was out for somewhere around 45 minutes with the Little Rock Hash House Harriers this afternoon. We ran from Curran Conway Park near UALR. ...This evening, I watched as Mike Moustakas hit his 200th career home run to help Cincinnati defeat Tampa Bay. Later, while flipping between CNN and Fox News, I watched horrific reports of a flaming row of condominiums in suburban Cincinnati. By bedtime, suspects in the explosions that killed twenty-seven had been narrowed to Ansar al-Sharia and a rogue sand cat from the Kansas City Zoo. Moustakas was unharmed.

Burns Park Championship Course

 When Ed and I walked off the front nine of the Burns Park Championship Course front nine this morning at 8:16 a.m., the heat index was 96°F. It was 113 at four this afternoon. I walked nine holes, played seven, and later fried bacon and eggs on the dashboard of my Crown Vic. 

Burns Park Tournament Course

 John, Ed, and I played Burns Park Tournament Course today. We started at 6:30 a.m. I played the front nine in 49, with 2 pars, 2 bogies, 4 doubles, and 1 quadruple. I lost count of the putts but it was more than 11.

Front yard

 My only exercise today will likely be the c. thirty-two minutes I spent mowing my front lawn this morning. It is again hotter than you-know-whats in Levy. By the way, the new battery mower was a snap to push. For some perhaps flawed reasoning, I felt free to turn the mower on its side to pull out anything that might have wrapped around the blades or stuck to the interior sides. It was nearly spotless.

Levy Trail Loop

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop this morning in 35:39. I started at about 6 a.m. and was uncomfortably cool for the first five minutes or so.

Burns Park Championship Course

 As part of my outrageous attempt to no longer be whinier than two motherfuckers every single time I don't like something, I have decided to no longer keep anyone's golf score, including my own. That does not include at least an effort to record mine once I get home. Ed Pennington, John Czarnecki, and I played the back nine of the Burns Park Championship Course from the pink tees this morning. I scored 44, with 3 pars, 4 bogies, and 2 doubles. I used 11 putts, which will go in the books as my lifetime's fewest for nine holes. Please understand this total included seven one-putts, all of which followed easy chips and putts from the fringe. ...Ed and John continued forward with a plan to play 18 holes. I was delighted by my play and unfatigued, but for my first attempt at golf in 11 weeks and 4 days, I thought it best to see how nine holes affected me before I played more.*

*by the way, I am proud to report I played nine holes today w/out a complaint leveled against anything or anyone. Also, I did not mention my dislike for costume-wearing at last Saturday's race. When called out, I explained my parents were so poor they could not afford book covers for the Zane Gray novels they bought me as a child. Consequently, the lime green short pants, white golf shirt, dark green cap, and running shoes I wore were exactly how I had always imagined cowboys dressed. Several women—no kidding—shit their cowgirl skirts**

**again, by the way, I silently thought of and rehearsed that line at least a dozen times after I was asked to present the awards

Willow Street Loop

 This Willow Street Loop prays on my laziness, the same sort that has made it impossible for me to continue on a Hash that goes right past the start-finish halfway through. I walked one lap this morning in 18:07.

Great Cross Country Race

I walked the Great Cross Country Race through Boyle Park yesterday for about half an hour. 

Levy Trail South

 My right hip felt fine for about fifteen minutes as I attempted to walk  Levy Trail South this morning. A moment after I passed the Levy Church of God in Christ, I felt a twinge of discomfort and turned back home. That mere hint of pain never increased. I was out for 32:38. ...By the way, my hat is off to NBC News. It had a nearly perfectly balanced cast of people who offered opinions on the U.S. Supreme Court's ruling this morning?

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY  Is my pro-abortion stance as self-centered as I made it sound to one of my readers early this afternoon? You know, probably not. I am also pro-women's rights, and I know it is certainly unfair that women and other Democrats will have to figure a way to overcome hurdles put in place to limit representative government so as to have justices eager to at least consider reversing today's ruling.

Nevertheless, everyone can see the deck and count the cards and should recognize the difficult task ahead, but they would have to be lazier than two motherfuckers to consider those obstacles insurmountable. Adjust or hush, i.e. show up. It will be expensive and hard as heck. Anyone who believes the matter is more complex than that is full of shit.

Simple affairs are the hardest to change.

Should I work to overcome my unwillingness to wear costumes to events other than Halloween parties? No. That is the perfect equivalent of asking me to work toward at least occasionally breaking sixty at Augusta National or making Albert Einstein a laughingstock among past and present university physicists ("The Theory of Relativity? What was Al thinking? Shit, look here. Rockamundo has these crackheads from Levy making day trips to the fucking Crab Nebula.").

Willow Street Loop

 I walked the Willow Street Loop this morning in 17:33.

Willow Street Loop

 I walked two laps of the one-mile Willow Street Loop this morning in 34:39. My right hip/groin area was relatively pain-free. I have chosen to at least briefly limit my aerobic exercise to this loop since it keeps me no more than a half-mile from my house, on the chance the excruciating pain I experienced a couple of Saturdays ago returns. That was close to the most pain I have felt, and I was a mile away from home. Had it not subsided so quickly once I sat on my new recliner, I would have driven directly to an emergency room.

Willow Street Loop

I walked the one-mile Willow Street Loop late this afternoon in a very easy 18:46. I used the Willow Street Loop to add a mile to some of my routes when I still ran. However, the loop was called something else back then. I can't find its original name. ...I put as much relative effort into my lunchtime mass email as I do for the stories I write for the paper. It was much shorter, of course, so it didn't take me more than fifteen minutes. I was pleased Tom commented on it. ...I talked to a neighbor who lives near the top of Orange Steet Hill while on my walk. He was using a battery-powered lawnmower, and I stopped to ask him about it. Jerry Tucker seemed like a gem of a fellow.

Levy Trail Loop

 I walked a short version of the Levy Trail Loop this morning and was out for 28:40.

Levy

 I walked 1K (0.62 miles) this morning in 11:31.8. This was the route I have used at least a couple of times for the Jesus Christ Memorial 1K Race to Hell and Back.

Levy/Hash

  At about 12:30 p.m., it is 93°F in Levy with a heat index of 108. The television weathermen say it's gonna get worse through at least next weekend. The guy on Channel 4 said last night it will be as hot as it ever got last summer. The point is, I walked a bit around Levy at lunchtime today, deferring to yesterday's groin pain (which I now theorize was hip pain). It felt fine, but I then deferred to the heat and quit after 16:38. ...I was out with the Little Rock Hash Harriers this afternoon for a little over forty-six minutes. We ran from a North Little Rock neighborhood unfamiliar to me. It was over by Crystal Hill Road, not far from the intersection of I-40 and 1-430.

Levy Trail Loop

 I had not experienced pain in my right groin since last Sunday, but it was borderline crippling today. To finish the last half-mile or so, I had to slow way, way down. Nevertheless, I walked the Levy Trail Loop this morning in 34:28. This was identical to the pain from six days ago, except it was much more severe. An hour later, it is completely gone and obviously a bit baffling.

Levy Loop

If I had looked at my watch, I might have picked up the pace late, at least by a butt hair. I walked the now old-school Levy Loop this morning in 33:00 (32:59.96). This was by far the most effortless of my recent relatively-fast two-mile walks. Nearly eight hours of truly uninterrupted sleep last night might've helped.

Levy Trail Loop

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop this overcast thunderstorms-on-the-way morning in 33:30.

Levy Trail North

 I walked Levy Trail North this morning in 31:54, which is clearly my best effort performance since the second week of May. It was a with a bit of effort. I took my pulse at about 1.5 miles, and it was at 128 (+/- bpm). That would be a typical easy-jog rate from a few years ago, back when easy jogs were still possible. ...I feel as if I should no longer worry about the potential groin cancer I mentioned Sunday morning.

Levy Trail Loop

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop at lunchtime today in 36:12. ...Minjee Lee won the U.S. Women's Open. Ingrid Lindblad finished 12th, something like 13 strokes back. Had she scored a shot better, she would have qualified for the next season's Open. She was the amateur medalist, received an enthusiastic hurrah, and seemed delighted. Her post-tournament interview went well. Sung Hyun Park, aka Na Yeon Choi, Jr., finished tied for 28th, I think. She won somewhere around $16,000.

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 38:30. There is a bit of pain in the vicinity of my right groin. I hope it's not groin cancer. You know, the deadliest of all cancers. It is likely not, I believe. ...Beginning at about 9 p.m., Pam's Boy readers in Czechoslovakia might have a chance to watch the U.S. Women's Open at usga.com. Regrettably, the Pam's Boy jinx applied yesterday to Sweden's Ingrid Lindblad and South Korea's Sung Hyun Park. The latter, Miss 2022 U.S. Women's Open, shot 6-over Saturday. However, she is 3-under today at a bit past lunchtime and currently tied for 19th, 12 strokes back with eight holes to play. The former shot even-par yesterday to drop into a six-way tie for fourth, seven strokes behind the leader Minjee Lee of Australia. American Mina Harigae, who seems impossible to dislike, is in second, three strokes behind. Waiting to watch that final group is hard.

Mina Harigae (who smiles a bit like Erin Vratil, it seems to me)

Minjee Lee

Ingrid Lindblad at Stephens Cup in Roland, Arkansas (twenty-minute drive from Levy)

OVERHEARD  "You can't learn all the shots on the range. Sometimes you have to go out and play."—Lead Peacock Network announcer for the Sunday and final-round group of American's Yealimi Noh and Jennifer Kupcho (both of whom are madder than two motherfuckers at 10-over and 6-over-par, respectively)

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South this warm morning in 36:02. ...Mammal Game participation was limited to two species. Dogs defeated squirrels, 5-2. ...The amateur Ingrid Lindblad finished Round 2 of the U.S. Women's Open at six-under-par 136. She is tied for fifth, three strokes behind the leader, an American named Mina Harigae. Top petepretty contender is Sung Hyun Park, who is tied for ninth at four-under. Park won this event in 2017 when she was ranked No. 1. She returned to No. 1 in 2019 but has since dropped to 300+. My household is delighted to see her back in contention, which any of my readers will understand with a glance.

Levy Trail

I walked with the Geezers on the Levy Trail this morning for 40:52. ...A player from Louisiana State and Sweden named Ingrid Lindblad led the first round of the U.S. Women's Open most of the day today as I watched on a streaming service called Peacock. I wrote a long note about her and her team when they played in the Stephens Cup at the Alotian Club last fall. Lindblad, by the way, is currently alone in second, one stroke back. Her score of six-under-par was the lowest ever by an amateur in the Women's Open. Obviously, I hope she wins. Here's that note:

JACKSON T. STEPHENS CUP report by Pete Perkins

The LSU Tigers women’s golf team might have worked itself into a position for early favoritism for next spring’s SEC and NCAA Championships.

They won stroke- and match-play championships in the first Jackson T. Stephens Cup at the Alotian Club in Roland on Monday through Wednesday.

“I can finally breathe after getting off those greens,” LSU Coach Garrett Runion said. “Those are the fastest greens I have ever seen in college golf, but they are so good. You can make putts, so it was a real treat to be out here. Thankfully, [our team] handled it very well.”

LSU won the match-play final 4-1-0 over South Carolina on Wednesday, led by a 3&1 win by Elso Svensson over Justine Fournand and a 3&2 win by Corlo Tejedo over Tai Audit.

LSU’s Ingrid Lindblad was 1-up over South Carolina’s Hannah Darling through 16 holes. After Darling drove 270 yards on the 488-yard par-5 17th, she and Lindblad were told the team competition was decided in LSU’s favor. Common to match-play team events, Lindblad and Darling left their match where it stood.

Lindblad drove her cart to the 18th green where she immediately hugged her champion teammates.

“I teed up my ball, and someone said, ‘We’re done,’ ” Lindblad said. “That can happen sometimes.”

Lindblad said she had an up-and-down week, highlighted by her Stephens Cup stroke-play medalist title on Tuesday.

“Yesterday, I started birdie-double, so I wasn’t really sure how it was going to turn out after that, but I played really good after that,” she said.

Runion said he was impressed throughout by Lindblad’s play.

“She played absolutely great,” he said. “The way she was down a couple shots on the second day [of stroke play] and came back to win, she’s just a competitor. She’s tough to beat.”

Lindblad led Darling 3-up through 11 holes, but Darling advanced to 1-down on the following two holes. They then played even until the championship was declared.

Runion said the Stephens Cup should assist his team in its 2022 championship pursuits. 

“This was a great experience,” Runion said.