Maple Street Loop

I walked the Maple Street Loop this afternoon in 34:23. It's sunny, dry as old rib bones, and 82°F in Levy.

Fort Roots Loop/Levy Trail South

We Geezers walked the Fort Roots Loop from the parking lot of Burns Park Golf Course this morning in 1:41:51. It began to rain as I drove out of the parking lot. Weathermen say it won't stop until the middle of April.
I walked and jogged Levy Trail South late this afternoon in 27:08. At first I walked very slowly, but with about a half mile to go, just as I crossed 38th Street headed north on the Levy Trail, lightning began to strike no more than a quarter of a mile away. Consequently I ran as fast as I could the rest of the way home.

I PLAN TO STAB...
...the next person who says, "...teachable moment"

...the next person who uses "decades" as a unit of time instead of bothering to figure out at least close to however long something's been*
*best we can figure, decades, as in "it's been decades," means since the 1990s or earlier and/or somewhere between twenty and ninety years ago

Heights

We Geezers walked for 1:14:58 through the Heights this morning looking at flowers and other stuff Bob McKinney pointed out.

Levy Trail South/Fort Roots

I alternated four-minute walks with one-minute jogs to complete Levy Trail South at lunchtime today in 29:32.
This evening I walked two laps around what was once the Fort Roots Golf Course and one lap around the fitness trial for a total walk of 1:10:39. The course closed in the summer of 2014. I found two golf balls on the second lap, both near the No. 3 tee box. One is a Pinnacle range ball, and the other a pink Lady Senator. Only three holes, Nos. 2-4, could be recovered without tearing down buildings. The No. 4 green has two small trees growing out of it.

33rd Street Loop/Hash

I walked the 33rd Street Loop this morning in 1:19:13.
Z Man and I walked for 32:17 on Kayce's Hash run this afternoon. We ended at her new house up in the Heights. It's a neat place

OVERHEARD
"Hey, are you following me?"
—a roughly twenty-year-old man on 38th Street, wearing a No. 2 Dallas Cowboys jersey and a black baseball hat on backwards, who had looked over his shoulder at me suspiciously for about forty-five seconds before exposing his Easter morning paranoia. This guy made the loser* who sat to the right of Miss Ray Winder Field 2006 look like Roger fucking Staubach
*Ms. Everyday Running's assessment of the fellow, formed the very minute she first saw him as he sat next to the eventual pageant winner

River Trail

We Geezers walked from the Clinton Library to the skate park and back this morning on the River Trail. Elaine's watch said we went seven miles. We were out for 1:59:03. It was funny when she turned her watch on in Park Hill and it said we had averaged eight minutes a mile. Ron explained to me that the miles we had driven were included in its pace calculation.

Levy Trail Loop

I walked the Levy Trail Loop late this afternoon in 31:27 and saw Amy Webb as she picked up her daughters at the daycare on 35th Street.

Burns Park Loop/Levy Trail South

I walked the Burns Park Loop this morning with Sandy Venable in 1:39:12.
Late this afternoon I walked Levy Trail South in 33:36. While on the trail I saw an old-school high-school or college kid cranking out seven-minute miles. I applauded him, and he looked pleased.

Poplar Street Loop

I walked and jogged two laps of the one-mile Poplar Street Loop in 14:18 and 14:26. With a half-mile warmup and warm-down, I completed three miles in 43:33.

Ridge Road Loop/Levy Trail Loop

I walked the ol' four-mile Ridge Road Loop this morning in 1:02:54.
This evening, beginning at about 7:30, I alternated one-minute jogs with one-minute walks to complete the Levy Trail Loop in 23:51. Except for stiff calves, I felt great.

I PLAN TO STAB...
...the next parent to name their daughter Morgan or Taylor

Maple Street Loop/Levy Trail 5K

I alternated one-minute jogs with four-minute walks to complete the Maple Street Loop this morning in 29:47.
Late this afternoon I walked the Levy Trail 5K in 49:28. I crossed three miles in 47:56.

Levy Trail North

I alternated two-minute jogs with three-minute walks to complete Levy Trail North this morning in 27:53. It's cold and windy in Levy.

Maple Street Loop/Oaklawn Park

I walked the Maple Street Loop this morning in 32:19. It feels cold out at 46°F with a hard wind. Horses like this stuff.
I lost $19.20 at Oaklawn Park on Saturday and am now down $19.20 after thirteen trips.

Levi Trail 5K/38th Street Loop

As I walked around my house this morning I could tell my legs felt bouncy and so was not surprised to run the first two miles of the Levy Trail 5K nonstop. I finished them in 23:46 and the 5K in 39:33, with splits of 12:03, 11:43, and 14:42. I went through three miles in 38:27. I could have finished the course nonstop but would've had to work. The two miles were a relative snap.
I walked the 38th Street Loop this evening in 33:19.

Levy Trail North/Oaklawn Park

I walked Levy Trail North this morning in 30:31.
This afternoon I lost $8.00 at Oakawn Park. After twelve trips, I am at exactly $0.00. So I'm kicking butt relative to most recent seasons. Before I started betting, I wrote a nice story about a 79-year-old trainer named Jack Van Berg. He was famous in the 1980s. He looks like he's about 99 but is funny as hell and hates lawyers and is all-out for Donald Trump. "See if you cain't work that into your story. All them other son of bitches is goddamn lawyers, and they's the ones all against him."
After I stopped betting, Tom Zaloudek, a fellow UALR graduate, joined me at Rocky's across the street from the track where we cheered like two motherfuckers as the Trojans upset Purdue with an 85-83 overtime victory in the first round of the NCAA Tournament. This, by the way, was UALR's second NCAA Tournament victory. Their last was exactly thirty years ago, when they beat Notre Dame, back when Jack Van Berg was famous.

I PLAN TO STAB...
...the next person who agrees to use Samuel L. Jackson on a television commercial

38th Street Loop

Here's how busy I've been. I walked the 38th Street Loop at about 3:30 p.m., in 31:50, but felt as if I needed to start working on an Oaklawn Park Rebel Stakes story the instant I walked in the door. It just occurred to me a minute or two ago, and roughly 8 p.m., that I hadn't recorded my effort. I'm full of vigor and could probably go for a nice run-walk tonight but probably won't. I need a good night's sleep. Tomorrow will be a long day at Oaklawn.

Levy Trail Loop

I walked the Levy Trail Loop this morning in 33:08 and wore the clothes I'll wear for my trip to Nashville today—blue jeans and a navy-blue polo. That's how nice our weather is.

Maple Street Loop/Levy Trail South

My legs were as dead as Marco Rubio's presidential hope as I alternated one-minutes jogs with one-minute walks to complete the Maple Street Loop late this sunny and cool morning in 25:33. I blame, legitimately I believe, the six tacos I cooked and ate last night.
At 6:52 p.m., it's 76°F in Levy. I just got in from Levy Trail South, which I walked in 33:51.

Levy Trail Loop/Levy Loop

I walked the Levy Trail Loop at lunchtime today in 32:06 and felt as if I could've walked all day at that pace.
We had a state full of hail and tornados today, but very little damage. It seemed nice tonight, until I got about half way through the Levy Loop and heavy rain, thunder, and lightning rolled in. On top of that, my blood sugar was far too low, so I kind of staggered through an equal ratio of walks and jogs to complete the loop in 26:42.

OVERHEARD
"I don't want to minimalize the risk for those of you in Garland County."
—Channel 11 weatherman Ed Buckner interrupting the NCAA Tournament selection show with a made-up word. UALR is a 12th seed and will play fifth-seeded Purdue on Thursday in Denver. We'll get the game here on CBS. I can't wait. This is the first time since the late 1980s that the Trojans have played an NCAA Tournament game they can win

Oaklawn Park

HOT SPRINGS—I walked for 42:39 this morning from the Oakawn Park parking lot, primarily out and back on Henderson Street, which runs perpendicular to the track in a westerly direction. My legs are dead. I probably didn't go much more than two and a third miles.
I won $5.20 today, which put my winnings at $8.00 after eleven trips. I also wrote a nice story about the Grade III Honeybee Stakes, a 1 and 1/16th-mile race for three-year-old fillies.

I'M CALLING BULLSHIT...
...on a sixty-year-old gardener who appeared on Food For Thought with Claire Thomas, after he said: "Kids today don't know where food comes from. They think onions come from a store. Or tomatoes. They come from the store. I had a kid say to me, 'I'm not eating that. It's been in the ground.' "
This sort of poppycock reminds me of Tom Watson's line: "I have people ask me all the time, 'Tom, how do I get started in golf?' "

Levy Trail 5K/Orange Street Loop

I walked the Levy Trail 5K through a fine, cool mist this morning in 48:52 and went through three miles in 47:15.
This evening I alternated one-minute jogs with one-minute walks to complete the Orange Street Loop in 37:40, with splits of 12:48, 12:31, and 12:21, and was surprised it went as easily as it did. My calves got a little stiff, but that was all that limited me

OVERHEARD
"I see you back at it."
—overweight fellow on the Levy Trail near the Levy Church of Christ

McMain Mall/Levy Trail South

I walked through and around McMain Mall this morning for 1:05:56. Yes, four miles of mall-walking. I kind of like it and have formed two loops—one that never goes in any stores and another that goes into Sears. The regular loop takes about eleven minutes and the one with Sears about a minute and a half longer. I was one of three walkers. The other two were a man and woman, each at least seventy years old.
This evening I walked Levy Trail South in 29:49. At about 6 p.m., it stopped raining for the first time in two and a half months.

McMain Mall/Levy Trail

Apparently I have completely recovered from my gout. My foot felt fine as I walked for 50:05 around McMain Mall. I couldn't help but smile as I wondered what the over-under would be on members of teams which competed in the 1977 mens NCAA Cross Country Championships who have ever mall-walked. I think I'd put it at about fourteen.
I jogged for a total of two minutes through the first and final half mile and alternated one-minute jogs with one-minute walks through the middle mile to complete the Levy Loop this evening in 26:34, with splits of 13:18 and 13:16. My fat legs felt great.
Afterward, as I walked down my driveway, for about half a second I mistook a stump for Samantha (not, "Hey, Samantha's back." More like, "There's Samantha," as if she weren't currently Iams dog food).

OVERHEARD
"That's dedication if I've ever seen it."
—40-year-old man who did not sound like a man raised in Levy from his front porch as I jogged by in the rain on Maple Street

"There used to be a chink store right here, sold all sorts of Chinese stuff."
—middle-aged woman with a midwestern accent to her husband on the lower level of McCain Mall

Levy Trail South

I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 34:40. My left foot feels better, though it remains limiting.

Hash

I walked for 37:11 in Burns Park late this afternoon with the Little Rock Hash Harriers after I spent the morning through mid-afternoon watching and writing about the Little Rock Marathon.
The metatarsal in my left foot that leads to the big toe hurts. At least I think that's what hurts. I'm not sure why. I woke up at about 2 a.m. this morning and my foot hurt a lot. It has since. I'm subjecting it to the ol' ice and ibuprofen treatment and don't think it's anything too severe. It hurt as I walked today but not terribly. We'll see.

Paragraph(s) of the day from A Different Closet
“I’m hungry, but other than that, yes, I’m fine.”
He looked relaxed and vaguely pleased, the same as always. Karen knew she should not be surprised, even though he had just admitted to the world that his fantastic story was untrue. Surely he knew of the ruin to come. He had to, yet he walked along as if all were the same. She knew of course that for him it was.

“Do you love me?” she said.

Keith stopped. He stood still for a second before he turned toward her. She tried but could not imagine what he was thinking. “The days ahead are going to be hard, really hard,” he said. “I think they’ll be too hard, don’t you?”

“Too hard? I don’t know what you mean. Either way, I don’t care. Do you love me?”

He seemed to have not heard her. She watched him squat and reach for something on the sidewalk. A bug. It was a ladybug. He pushed it with one finger tip onto another and reached to place it on a blade of grass. “You, Karen, are all that I will ever love, so yes, I love you.”
He looked up and past her toward the traffic on Skinker. “Heck, I’ve loved you since you taught me how to cook a steak. Haven’t I told you that?”

“No, not exactly.” Despite the disaster, this was her happiest moment. “I didn’t know for sure.”

“Well, regardless, I love you, and I’m hungry,” Keith said. “Let’s go find something to eat.”

Karen shook her head and laughed. She couldn’t help it.

Levy Trail North/Oaklawn Park

I walked Levy Trail North this morning in 32:00 (31:59.61).
Before I wrote a fair story about the Hot Springs Stakes, I won $12.80 at Oaklawn Park this afternoon. After ten trips, I'm up $2.80.

Paragraph(s) of the day from A Different Closet

There were a few days like this each August. Cool wind from the northwest had blown away the dankness, and high clouds diffused into a translucent sheet that spread over the sky to leave a bright white afternoon, breezy and dry and almost cool, all serving as an advertisement for fall. These sorts of days always reminded Keith of football, even now as he walked through waves of roaring cheer to the microphone set between him and the last crowd he would address. Thousands of people sat in a panorama of grass that spread like an Asian fan above him, rising to the Art Museum a quarter of a mile away. But St. Louis was a baseball town, and he could see it, Cardinal jerseys and shirts and hats everywhere, and smell it, the air streaked by wafts of smoke from the grills and filled with a smell of charcoal and meat.

Levy Trail Loop/Levy Trail South

It's sunny, dry, and 46°F in Levy at 7:56 a.m. I just got in from walking the Levy Trail Loop in 28:58. Last night I set my alarm for 6 a.m. as part of an attempt to prepare for a 5:30 a.m. wakeup on Sunday to cover the Little Rock Marathon for the paper. I wandered into my living room at 6:35 this morning as I tried to figure out why all those bars and nightclubs around my front bedroom were using the same noise-maker to draw my interest. It took me about a minute to figure it out and return to the bedroom to turn off the alarm.
Maybe I'll do better tomorrow.
This afternoon I walked Levy Trail South in 32:14.

Paragraph(s) of the day from A Different Closet

He got out and began to walk. Cars flowed past. Then one slowed, and its driver waved. She looked familiar. Her AMC Pacer pulled to the side of the street, twenty yards ahead.

She stood, leaned out of her window and twisted back. “Mr. Ingram, do you need help?”

“Yes, I do. I need a ride. My car just blew up.”

“Well, come on,” she said. “Let’s go. You’re gonna be late.”

Keith knew her from somewhere. She was cute, a distinct tomboy with short blonde hair, dressed in a bright red tennis skirt and a white St. Louis Cardinal baseball jersey.

“This’ll be a story for my grandkids,” she said. “I drove Keith Ingram to one of his speeches.”

“You’re a life saver.”

“No I’m not. Buckle up.”

He knew her. “We’ve met, haven’t we?”

She accelerated into the traffic. “Yeah, I’m an assistant producer at KSLM, the TV station. I helped...”

“With my makeup! Of course, sure, before that Monday Night Football game last fall. I knew I recognized you from somewhere. How have you been? How’s school going? I’m sorry, please tell me your name again.”

“I’m Sarah. Sarah Schiff. I’ll never forget how nervous you were that night.”

“Man, I was about to crap myself. And you know what, I’ll never forget the way you winked at me just before they turned on the cameras. You said, ‘Don’t worry. You’ll do fine,’ or something like that.”

She beamed. “Yeah, it is was something like that. I’d forgotten.”

“I remember how much it helped. I still almost threw up, but I would’ve for sure if it weren’t for you.”

“That’s why they hired me, to keep people from puking. But you’ve come a long way. Every time I see you now you look like a regular pro, like you’ve been making speeches and doing interviews all your life.”

“Yeah, well, you get the credit.”

“Bullshit,” Sarah said. “You’re the one who’s done this. The credit goes to you. You’ve just been wonderful right from the start.”

Keith suddenly wondered if this was the most beautiful woman on earth. “You know what, you’re gorgeous,” he said. “I remember thinking that last fall. Thank you. That was so nice of you to say.”

“I’m not just saying it. You’re someone no one’s ever seen.”

Levy Trail/35th Street Loop

I walked on the Levy Trail for 40:04 this morning to cover about two and a half miles. It's gray, cool, and damp here.
This evening I completed the 35th Street Loop in 56:45 by alternating one-minute jogs with walks of four minutes for the first mile, two minutes for the second, three for the third, and one for the fourth. My splits were 14:57, 14:05, 14:38, and 13:05.

Paragraph(s) of the day from A Different Closet

Green listened to the message shortly before midnight. He knew what Hardman wanted to say. The word was out.

U.S. representatives Gary Studds and Hardman had spent most of the previous two weeks spearheading a move to provide federal funding for research on the use of azidothymidine, or AZT, in the treatment of AIDs. AZT was first synthesized as a possible treatment for cancer, but it proved insufficient for that task, and research involving it was shelved in the mid-1960s until scientists at the National Cancer Institute, Duke University, and at a London-based pharmaceutical company began independently to consider effects it might have on the HIV virus. Results of their tests proved encouraging, and the researchers began to collaborate. They were hopeful, but they needed money. The day Hardman left his message for Ingram, the U.S. government had made available grants totaling ten billion dollars for research involving the treatment of AIDs, with the bulk of it targeted at AZT advocates and researchers.

Green reached Keith at Karen Shoemaker’s house. “Take notes, so that you’ll know what you’re talking about when you reach Hardman,” he said.

Keith then called Hardman and listened to him brag and apologize until one in the morning. “Ingram, between you and me, I’m giving you credit,” Hardman said. “You opened my eyes to this. Now, as you know, homosexuality ain’t exactly been the kind of calling card you’d want to tote into Missouri’s first district, but it seems like you found out how to get away with it. You’ve found a way to turn old enemies into allies. Shit, you got President Reagan talking about AIDs research, so hats off to you.

“But understand this, Ingram. I know that tomorrow everybody’s gonna go on and on about how I’m just doing this to try to win a few votes, to try to steal some of your thunder, but I want you to know that if I get any of those kinds of benefits, that ain't nothing but gravy. I’m doing this because I think it’s the right thing to do, and that’s god’s own truth right there, and I want you to know it.”

Keith could not imagine anything else. “I know, Ron. Thank you.”

Levy Trail North/Orange Street Loop

I walked Levy Trail North this morning in 31:01. My calves were not at all stiff. I hope to try a little jogging tonight.
This evening I walked and jogged the first two miles of the Orange Street Loop in 27:33. I jogged a for a total of three minutes during the first mile, and alternated one-minute jogs with one-minute walks during the second. My splits were 14:22 and 13:11.

Paragraph(s) of the day from A Different Closet

“Do you remember the conversation we had back when you first considered joining SAGA?”

“I remember several.”

“I mean that evening on the back deck of my house, when I nearly burned the chicken?”

“Oh sure, yes, of course.”

“When I told you about my choice?”

“Yes, that you chose heterosexuality. Of course I remember that.”

“I thought you would. To be honest, I guess I meant that as a rhetorical question. That’s not the sort of thing that would be easy to forget.” Shoemaker paused and stared straight ahead into the darkness at the far end of the court. “Well, there’s something else I want to tell you, and it’s this. Keith, because of you, because of the way you’ve represented yourself in our lives, in my family’s, in the church, it has caused me to reconsider the morality of your choice. Thanks to you, I’m no longer sure why our church and our nation has insisted on categorizing homosexuality with the worst of sins. It is a sin, of course, but I don’t know why we have been so intolerant of it. We are all sinners, all of us. Why have we for so long specifically demanded discrimination against your type? I don’t know, but I know that I will no longer. Our church and our nation should include you and yours, and from this point forward I will preach for that end.”

They sat in silence for a moment. Keith suspected Shoemaker felt his concession was adequate, and maybe it was. He knew that within the framework of Shoemaker’s life—his calling—it was significant.

“Well, I guess that’s good news,” Keith said. “All I wish you could add is that there is nothing immoral about homosexuality, but I understand that you can’t. Still, thanks for sharing that with me.”

Maple Street/Levy Trail South

I could go on this entire rainy morning and still not have enough time to express exactly how fucking stiff my calves got as I walked the Maple Street Loop in 29:45.
This afternoon I walked Levy Trail South in 31:23 and almost immediately thereafter went to UALR's game against Arkansas State with Basil Julian and his wife Linda, Tom Z-Man, and Rosemary, where we joined about ten other Hashers. UALR beat ASU pretty handily and is now 27-3, which is the best record ever in the Sun Belt Conference (the league started for the 1976-77 season). Their gym, the Jack Stephens Center, was sold out.

Paragraph(s) of the day from A Different Closet
Green told Keith that Dornfeld said it was as if someone removed the money faucets from their headquarters, all because of Lardner. Donations were flooding in. “I’ll have to remember this strategy, because we’re swimming in money out here,” Dornfeld told Green. “It’s simple. Just knock out a pro football player and then take a bullet in the face. That should work, I’d say, about every single time.”

Keith had other concerns.

A plastic surgeon assured him the scars on his cheeks would be minimal, but for the moment, as he looked in his bathroom mirror, he saw steel thread woven into blood-red seams and wondered how long he would have to wait. His gums remained swollen and painful. It would be a week or more before he could wear dentures in place of the teeth he’d lost in the blood-soaked tar of Candy’s parking lot. He remained weak and wary, and the last thing he wanted was an outbreak of encouragement, which he knew was on the way.