River Trail

We Geezers walked from the Burns Park Golf Course parking lot this morning for 1:23:16, mostly on the River Trail.

Hash

This morning, I set my first real Hash run since Christmas, 2003. It started at the Emerald Park parking lot and ran across the old Fort Roots Golf Course and over the Emerald Park trails. It took me 1:52:55 to set. Hashers with GPS watches said the run covered about four miles. They started at 10 a.m. There were a lot of complaints Friday and yesterday, but the twenty-five people who showed up seemed to have a blast. I think everyone approved.
Now I'm home watching an NFL preseason tripleheader, which of course was the fucking idea.

Lake Willastein

We Geezers walked for 1:34:58 from Lake Willastein in Maumelle this morning. Elaine's watch said we went 4.7 miles. Ron's said 5.1. It's cloudy and cool here.

War Memorial Golf Course/Levy Loop

Most of my friends who will likely drown or be battered to death later today are probably disinterested in my golf performance, but I guess their power and cell service are probably out anyway, so for the rest of you, I played War Memorial Golf Course this morning with John Czarnecki, Tim Biggs, and Ed Pennington and scored 76, with nines of 38 and 38. John scored 101, Tim 106, and Ed 96. It was my all-time best round relative to par. I was 12-over. Heretofore, my best in that category has been 14-over. I had 1 birdie, 10 pars, 3 bogies, 3 doubles, 1 quadruple, and used 31 putts.
Late this evening, I walked the Levy Loop in 32:10.

Country Club of Arkansas

I have never had less fun on a golf course than I did this morning and afternoon at Country Club of Arkansas. It felt as though I were playing by myself. I scored 108, with nines of 59 and 49.

War Memorial Golf Course/Levy Trail 5K

Someone mowed the greens on the back nine at War Memorial Golf Course so that they were as fast or faster than any I have ever putted on. I played with John Czarnecki and Ed Pennington, and they were unlike anything in any of our experiences. I three putted five greens on the back and two on the front. For the round, I used 41 putts, which I believe is a new record by one. I scored an 89 and John 110. I had 2 pars, 9 bogies, 6 doubles, and 1 quadruple.
John said he noticed the temperature drop as looked at the total solar eclipse. He was also in Missouri, about fifty miles northwest of Farmington. That's something I failed to investigate. Giving no thought to it, I didn't notice any change. I'll check next time.
This evening I walked the Levy Trail 5K in 47:05. I went through three miles in 45:40. My legs felt better after having walked a round of golf than I can ever remember. I might try to run a bit in the morning.

OVERHEARD
"It do."
—the middle-aged, overweight woman who is clearly the head of the household at the Taylor's former home, after Rock said, "It feels great out here, doesn't it?"

Levy Trail/War Memorial Golf Course

Five other Geezers and I walked for 1:06:21 on the Levy Trail this morning.
James Barr asked in an email that he sent at about 4:30 p.m. if I wanted to golf with him. Though I have plans to play each of the next three days, I jumped at his offer. I played Holes 1-13 and 18 with 3 pars, 6 bogies, 4 doubles, and 1 triple, and I used 26 putts. I played the front nine in 43.

I PLAN TO STAB...
...the next person whos says "second-class citizens" or "marginalized"

Florissant, Mo.

FLORISSANT, MO.—I walked for 1:17:59 near my brother Jim's house this morning. I started and finished on Central Parkway but spent quite a bit of time on a jogging-biking trail that leads up to Sunset Park, which overlooks the Missouri River. I didn't know it existed, though it seems like a perfect park for anything from large gatherings to intimate picnics and touch football games. I could not resist a return to Central Parkway on Foggy Bottom Drive.

Forest Park Hawthorne Course

ST. LOUIS—John Perkins and I played the nine-hole Hawthorne Course at Forest Park this afternoon. I scored 46 and John 52. It was a par 35. John would be very good if he played much. I had 1 par, 6 bogies, 1 double, and 1 triple. I was three for three with my driver but didn't putt particularly well. We had a blast. John's kids and Lindsey were wonderful during the hour or so we were together at their house.

QUESTION OF THE DAY
Do you suppose President Trump has to pick a Would You Rather every fucking day of the week?

War Memorial Golf Course

Tim Biggs and I played War Memorial Golf Course this morning. I had to stop after 12 holes. I scored a 47 for the front nine but played the first three holes of the back in one-over. I hope to play better tomorrow. John Perkins and I have a 1:39 tee-time set for nine holes at one of the Forest Park courses.

35th Street Loop/Levy Trail South

I walked the 35th Street at lunchtime today in 1:00:30, with splits of 15:34, 15:05, 15:01, and 14:50. Belly Shrink '17 has taken off.
I walked Levy Trail South this evening in 31:17.

I PLAN TO STAB...
...everyone in Virginia, South Carolina, and Baltimore

Levy Trail Loop/War Memorial Golf Course

I alternated 2:30 jogs with 2:30 walks to complete the Levy Trail Loop this afternoon in 26:54, with splits of 14:15 and 12:39. At 2:42 p.m., it's 91°F with a heat index of 102.
After a total of three hours of watching football practice and interviewing coaches and players at Central Arkansas Christian, Little Rock Fair, and Maumelle High Schools, I played the front nine at War Memorial Golf Course in 45. I had 2 pars, 1 bogey, and 6 doubles and used 18 putts.

Levy Trail South

I walked Levy Trail South this evening in 34:03. Though weather.com says there is a heat index of 96°F, I barely broke a sweat.

Levi Trail 5K/War Memorial Golf Course

I alternated 1:30 jogs with 3:30 walks to complete the Levy Trail 5K in 44:07. I went through three miles in 42:38. At 12:38 p.m., there is a mist falling in Levy and it's 74°F.
I predict the Japanese fuck will win the PGA this evening and that someone will raise hell about Kisner's tobacco habit.
I'm not sure about this, but I think the last time before this evening that I golfed after the final round of a major was in 1997, when Walt Webb, Jen Reynolds, and I played Rock Creek after Tiger Woods won his first Masters. I just got in from War Memorial Golf Course, where I played Nos. 1, 2, 7-10, 12, 13, and 18, or nine holes with a total par of 34 in 39. I had 2 birdies, 3 pars, 1 bogey, and 3 doubles. I used 14 putts. I'm pretty sure this was the first time I have ever birdied consecutive holes. I birdied the Par 5 12th with a sand wedge to four feet and the Par 3 13th with a 60° wedge chip-in from 15 feet. That gives me eight birdies for the year, which I believe is by far the most I have had in one year.
I'm on a nice run, but my game remains as fragile as ever. It's just a matter of time before I start sucking dicks again.

QUESTION OF THE DAY
Does anyone else think Rickie Fowler should get married just so he'll have someone in his life to tell him to quit wearing orange pants every fucking Sunday?

OVERHEARD
"Goddamn it. Seriously."
—Ian Poulter loudly, eight seconds ago, after he mishit his approach at No. 12, just in time for the golf crowd from the Levy Church of Christ

South Orange Street Loop

I alternated one-minute jogs with four-minute walks on a new roughly four-mile loop from the Senior Center that goes along South Orange Street into a part of North Little Rock I haven't spent much time in. In fact, I ran across a two-lane wooden bridge, open to traffic on 14th Street, I had never before seen. It smelled of tar, like the runaway-train or log rides at Six Flags. When I got back to the Center, I walked a mile on the indoor track just to dry out before I showered. In all, I covered a little over five miles in 1:21:08.

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY
Why would a liberal Democrat ever vote for a sales-tax increase?

How can anyone say that "there's no room in our society for" something that is a common constituent of our society?

Is Kevin Kisner a snuff dipper?

War Memorial Golf Course

Tim Biggs and I played War Memorial Golf Course this morning. I scored 84 and Tim 111. I had 5 pars, 7 bogies, 5 doubles, 1 triple, and used 34 putts.

Burns Park Loop

Our Geezer grouped was joined this morning by a young woman named Dani, an occasional Hasher. She's hard to not like, best I can tell. Sandy Venable, Bill Brass, YT Thompson, Rosemary, Dani, and I walked the Burns Park Loop. Sandy walked off and left us. Brass and I finished a few minutes in front of the other women in 1:52:18.
I took four units of Novolog before I ate a serving of oatmeal (1/2 cup) with a serving of blueberries (3/4 cups) for breakfast. I think two units would have been enough. I really wobbled through the last twenty-five minutes or so.

Senior Center

I walked two miles at the Senior Center this afternoon in 34:04.

Cooks Landing/War Memorial Park Golf Course

I walked with a bunch of Geezers this morning at Cooks Landing. We went about seven miles in 1:55:04.
This evening I played golf with James Barr and his retired friend Mike Wilson. They are two nice men. James is 60 and Mike 66. We played the front nine at War Memorial Golf Course and Holes 9-13 and 18 of the back. I scored a 44 for the front. James scored 36 and Mike 42. For the five holes on the back, I scored 26, James 22, and Mike 23.

OVERHEARD
"Pete, you've lost some weight, haven't you?"
—Pat, an occasional Geezer who was once married to Hugh, the retired doctor who was a regular all those years ago with the Monday night gang at Paul's

Lakewood Lake No. 2/War Memorial Golf Course

I walked for 1:58:37 around Lakewood Lake No. 2 and nearby neighborhoods with Ron and Elaine this morning to cover about 6.5 miles.
I played 12 holes of War Memorial Golf Course by myself this evening in 15-over 59. I had 2 pars, 6 bogies, 3 doubles, and 1 triple, and I used 21 putts. I scored a 44 for the front nine with 17 putts. After I parred the first two holes, an uphill 168-yard par 3 and a 370-yard par-4 with a 90-degree dog leg right at 220 yards, I was afraid I might score too well to feel free reporting it, sort of like if I were to hit a hole in one while golfing alone. Those holes are ranked as War's third and first toughest, respectively. It's a good thing I tripled No. 3.

Senior Center

I walked two miles at the Senior Center this afternoon in 30:29.

River Trail

I was out on the River Trail and around downtown and the River Market with a handful of Geezers for nearly two hours this morning. There were several museum and art stops along the way. Reverend Bob's watch said we went a little over four miles.

Ghetto Cat Loop/War Memorial Golf Course

I walked the Ghetto Cat Loop this morning in 31:50 and will leave in ten minutes for a round of golf with John, Tim, and Roger Tripod Chinn. This oughta be a hoot.
It was. We played War Memorial Golf Course. I scored 81 with nines of 41 and 40. Roger scored 92 and Tim 110. John had to quit after twelve holes to get ready for a biking trip. I used 30 putts and had 1 birdie, 5 pars, 8 bogies, 2 doubles, and 2 triples.

Pam's Path/War Memorial Golf Course

I walked the four-mile Pam's Path late this morning in 1:03:44. My legs feel great. I have weighed under 190 for the last three days, so I'm there for the first time since December, 2014. That helps, I guess.
This will sound like bullshit, but I walked in the door no more than a minute before kickoff of the first football game since early February. The Arizona Cardinals are hosting the Dallas Cowfucks in an absolutely meaningless preseason game that I have longed for since right around my goddamned birthday. I hurried through ten holes at War Memorial Golf Course to make it. I played with a very nice gray-haired fifty-something-year-old man named James Barr. I scored a 47 for the first ten holes, with nine in 42. I had 1 par, 8 bogies, and 2 doubles and used 21 putts. I averaged 230 on four drives and 210 on three 3-woods, which is killing it for me. My putting kind of sucked.

QUESTION OF THE DAY*
Has there ever been a more admirable television character than Matt Dillon, and if so, who was he or she? If not, was any other even comparable?
*meant to be taken literally

Two Rivers Park/Levy Trail South

I walked for a total of 2:07:44 at Two Rivers Park this morning, the first 1:21 with the Geezers and the final three miles or so by myself on the River Trail to the Big Dam Bridge and back. I estimate that I covered 7.2 miles.
This evening I walked Levy Trail South in 34:31.

Levy Trail Loop/War Memorial Golf Course/Maple Street Loop

I walked the Levy Trail Loop this morning, after about twenty minutes of tough yard work, in 32:18. Let's see how these efforts will affect my round of golf, set to begin with John Czarnecki and perhaps Tim Biggs and Gil in about half an hour.
John Czarnecki and I golfed this morning with Steve Grace at War Memorial Golf Course. Some of my longtime readers might remember Steve from a group I played with years ago at First Tee that included a Chinese guy named Bill, a South Korean whose name I can't recall (who taught me nice things to say to Korean golfers at the 2011 U.S. Women's Open), and a dentist named Steve Beatstra. I scored a 92, with nines of 47 and 45. John scored 96 and Steve 78. I used 34 putts but never three-putted. I had 1 birdie, 2 pars, 4 bogies, 9 doubles, 1 triple, and 1 quadruple.
Tonight I alternated one-minute jogs with one-minute walks and two-minute walks to complete the Maple Street Loop in 28:55, with splits of 14:34 and 14:21. I have new $19.95 shoes, the BCG Surge, which might replace the Evades when the seven or eight pairs I have left wear out. These are slightly mushier and have a bit of a disco look to them, but they felt fine. I can imagine getting used to them. In fact, they felt better as I went this evening. I am not, however, yet ready to order ten pairs.