Chandler Street Loop

I walked the Chandler Street Loop tonight in 44:50.

Orange Street Loop/Memphis

I walked the Orange Street Loop this morning in 43:06, and later, beginning at about 3 p.m., I walked with Tim Cooper from Beale Street to the Loraine Hotel and back, with a total walking time of about forty minutes. We went at least two miles. A little more, probably. Cooper had never seen the Loraine. Afterward, we ate at a place on Beale called Dyer's Burgers. There's a show on the Food Network called Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives, and it recently featured Dyer's (which has an easily-accessible Website that shows the clip, and another broadcast on the, I believe, Travel Channel or something, plus a menu that makes the place sound fantastic). It was mediocre as hell, except for the cute waitress who said she lived in West Memphis, and who knew nothing about the Loraine, or what happened there. We literally saw a large plastic question mark form over her head when I said, "Martin Luther King." It was blue. Then, for a total of $10, we watched the San Antonio Spurs beat the cow shit out of the Memphis Grizzlies at the FedEx Forum. I was home before midnight.

Hash

Has anyone, anyone at all, read the stuff google keeps insisting we read? If so, please tell me if I'm missing something I need to know. I mean, no fucking way, right?

I walked and jogged for 43:18 with the Hash House Harriers in Burns Park this afternoon.

OVERHEARD
"I like tits that are shaped like tits."
—Little Rock Hasher Brandon Munsell

38th Street Loop

I walked the 38th Street Loop this morning in 30:44.

I PLAN TO STAB...
...the next person who says, "It is what it is."

OVERHEARD
"Layered, whatever."
—mother to her son, in the front yard of a house near the top of Orange Street Hill, after he said, "I don't want a haircut. I want it layered."

Park Hill Loop

I walked and jogged the Park Hill Loop this evening in 1:08:27.

38th Street Loop/Oaklawn Park

I walked the 38th Street Loop this morning in 31:17, then went to Oaklawn Park with Tom Zaloudek, where I lost $16.80. I'm now down $53.40 after four trips.

47th Street Loop

I walked the 47th Street Loop through cold rain this morning in 45:07.

Levy Loop/First Tee/Chandler Street Loop

I walked the Levy Loop this morning in 31:23. I played from the middle tees at First Tee this afternoon, and scored a 52 for nine holes. I had 3 bogies, 4 doubles, and 2 triples. I used 15 putts. I hit one good full shot with a three-wood, none with my irons. All of my drives were in the fairway or light rough, but the longest went 176 yards. I hit a bunch of putts. Otherwise I suck. I don't want to play like that, at least not by myself. This evening, starting at about six, I walked the Chandler Street Loop in 48:11.

Orange Street Loop

I walked and jogged the Orange Street Loop this evening in 35:33.

Maple Street Loop

I walked the Maple Street Loop this evening in 29:49.

38th Street Loop

I walked the 38th Street Loop this morning in 29:44.

I PLAN TO STAB...
...the next person who says "the American people" instead of "Americans."

34th Street Loop

I walked the 34th Street Loop this morning in 45:51.

Sweetheart Loop/Oaklawn Park

I walked the Sweetheart Loop this morning in 43:56. The weather was borderline perfect for another day in Hot Springs, but it did not affect my gambling. I have decided to toss out A Different Closet, and write a book entitled How to Pick Five Winners in Nine Races and Still Lose Twenty-Seven Dollars and Ten Fucking Cents.

Chandler Street Loop/Levy Loop

I walked the Chandler Street Loop this morning in 45:42, and this evening walked the Levy Loop in 29:45.

Levy Trail

I walked and jogged the Levy Trail from here to Camp Robinson and back in 1:06:20.

OVERHEARD
"Change isn't always the easiest transition to make."
—Indianapolis Colts general manager Ryan Grigson

Oaklawn Park/Orange Street Loop

I walked from my car for 48:26 to the gate of Oaklawn Park, where I then spent the next five hours winning a total of $10.50. I'm down $9.50 after two trips. This evening I walked the Orange Street Loop in 45:35.

Maple Street Loop

I walked the Maple Street Loop before daybreak in 30:00 (29:59.53).

Levy Loop

No sky has ever been bluer than the one over Levy right now. It's a perfect winter morning—43°F, no wind, a good day for golf. I walked the Levy Loop in 31:02.

Orange Street Loop/Oaklawn Park

Here's hoping my mind is as sharp this afternoon as my legs were this morning. I walked the Orange Street Loop in 40:28, and it was easy. Oaklawn Park, on the other hand, was hard. I lost exactly $20.

Sweetheart Loop

This is one of those mornings we get about once every three winters in Levy, where garbage day coincides with a thirty mile-an-hour wind, and the streets and yards are consequently strewn with plastic garbage cans and Lil' Caesars pizza boxes. I walked the Sweetheart Loop in 43:49. There was garbage everywhere.

47th Street Loop/First Tee

I walked the 47th Street Loop this morning in 46:20.

I played First Tee this afternoon with a guy named George Norton. We played from the middle tees, and I scored a 50, with 1 par, 3 bogies, 4 doubles, and 1 triple. I used 17 putts.

34th Street Loop/Ghetto Cat Loop

This is weird. I just realized that I failed to report that I walked the 34th Street Loop this morning in 43:18, immediately after I opened this tonight to write about my 29:06 walking tour of the Ghetto Cat Loop.

34th Street Loop/Levy Loop

I walked the 34th Street Loop this morning in 43:19. This evening I walked and jogged the Levy Loop through cool mist in 26:04.

Maple Street Loop

I walked the Maple Street Loop in 30:46.

Levy Loop Classic

I walked and jogged Levy Loop Classic this evening in 25:04.

34th Street Loop/First Tee

I walked the 34th Street Loop this morning in 44:17. Late this afternoon I played nine holes at First Tee with Steve Grace, Bill Zhang, Steve Beatstra, and Jung Choi. We played from the back, and I scored a 52. I lost my pencil. Grace kept our score. I can't remember how many of what I had, except that I had one par. I think I used seventeen putts.

Orange Street Loop/First Tee/Levy Loop

I walked and jogged the Orange Street Loop this morning in 37:33, with splits of 12:34, 12:48, and 12:11, and decided I would like to become a real estate tycoon without putting any money down.* Immediately after I stepped in from a round at First Tee, I walked the Levy Loop in 31:04. I golfed this afternoon with Steve Grace and Bill Zhang, from the back tees on the first nine, and the middle on the second. I scored a 101, with nines of 52 and 49. I had 2 pars, 6 bogies, 6 doubles, and 4 triples, and used 32 putts.

*the second clause was added as a test to see whether or not I receive advertisements from Google for get-rich-quick schemes

Chandler Street Loop/38th Street Loop

I walked the Chandler Street Loop this morning in 46:29. Late this afternoon I walked the 38th Street Loop in 30:17.

Maple Street Loop

I walked the Maple Street Loop this evening in 28:49. It's 37°F, very cold by this winter's standard, so far.

Chandler Street Loop

I walked the Chandler Street Loop tonight in 44:10.

Maple Street Loop

I walked the Maple Street Loop this morning in 30:07. Weather.com says it's 53°F. It seems warmer than that.