War Memorial Golf Course

I scored an 86 while playing War Memorial Park Golf Course this morning with John Czarnecki and our mutual golf friend Gil (John met Gil at War Memorial last summer and introduced him to me last October. What's funny is that Gil was a childhood friend of Bob McKinney's). I had nines of 44 and 43 and used 32 putts.
Today I watched one of the most remarkable things I have ever seen on a golf course: John scored an 85. He had nines of 40 and 45. It was an incredible turnaround. I would not have believed it if I hadn't seen it myself.
Last Friday, a week ago, John scored a 108. His best previous score in our many rounds together was 102. Today he used exactly 17 fewer strokes. He was in a hurry to leave when we finished, so I didn't have time to ask whether or not he'd practiced some, or watched videos or whatever, in the last week.*  I have seen distinct hints of improvement in his game over the past couple of months, but Jesus.

*John told Pete during a telephone conversation that his most significant influence since his last round was watching UALR's women golfers at Maumelle Country Club on Monday

OVERHEARD
"From where I'm from, my god doesn't tell me that I have a fundamental right to carry a gun."
— Arkansas house representative Vivian Flowers of Pine Bluff as recorded by Little Rock's National Public Radio station. Pete heard this driving home from golf

Levy Trail South

I walked Levy Trail South early this afternoon in 35:18.

Levy Trail South/Maumelle Country Club

I walked Levy Trail South at lunchtime today in 32:56.
John Czarnecki and I walked 18 holes of the UALR-Arkansas State Invitational at Maumelle Country Club this afternoon. We were out for 3:48:00. Four players for UALR's women's team take Dr. John Czarnecki's earth science class.

BRACKETS
Through four rounds, Pete is in a two-way tie for first with Omar Steed and will win if South Carolina defeats Gonzaga and Oregon defeats North Carolina in the semifinal round and the points total of the championship game is 145 or more. He will finish second if it is less than 145. Walt and several contestants refigured the numbers to determine that Pete must have Gonzaga and North Carolina lose in order to stay in contention for two of the three prizes

Levy Loop

I walked and jogged the Levy Loop this afternoon in 27:42. My jogs were very slow.

BRACKET
With the Sweet 16 complete and eight teams remaining, Pete is in a three-way tie for third with Jason Files and Omar Steed (whoever the fuck that is). We all have chosen Kansas to win the national championship. The two people ahead of us are toast since their champions are on busses back the fuck to Philadelphia and Los Angeles.
Pete will win IF Kansas beats a team other than Gonzaga in the final and the point total of the final is 145 or over. I have been too impatient to dig through all the paperwork to find if Pete has any shot at money if Kansas doesn't win. We'll see. Also, I'm not sure what will happen if Gonzaga doesn't make the Final Four. That would open up more doors than I'm willing to take the time to look through.
Pete has never won the bracket at the paper. I think he's had two third-place finishes. For the time being, he's a big goddamn fan of the Kansas Jayfucks.

War Memorial Golf Course

John Czarnecki, Tim Biggs, and I golfed at War Memorial Golf Course this morning and afternoon. I scored a 92. Tim scored 107 and John 108. I used 36 putts. I had three pars and two triple bogies. This was my first time in a while to not have at least one big blowup hole. As usual, we had a lot of fun along the way.

BRACKET
After five days of the NCAA Tournament, Pete is in a three-way tie for sixth in the paper's pool. Pete II is alone in 50th among the 60 players. Pete I has Kansas winning the tournament and thinks a Kansas championship would leave him no worse than third and in money for the first time in years

Levy Trail South/Oaklawn Park

The butchers at Kroger have begun to package fresh St. Louis style spareribs in one-to-two pound segments, or roughly four to six pretty good sized ribs, in a light marinade of I'm not sure what. It works out great for me since I am no longer forced to cook an entire rack of ribs. Instead, I can cook a roughly Craig's-sized portion at 250 degrees for 1 hour, 45 minutes, and come from a 33:18 walk of Levy Trail South into a house that smells like Craig's.
This afternoon I lost $19.00 at Oaklawn Park and am now down $23.50 for the season. This was my first trip to the track with no writing assignment.

LONGSHOT PETE'S LONGSHOT SPECIAL OF THE DAY
Oaklawn Park, Race 7: box The Lone Roo (No. 8) with Only Liquor (No. 2) in a $2 exacta. If it hits, and Pete believes it has a reasonable chance, it will pay nicely
RESULT
Typical of Longshot Pete's day, The Lone Roo and Only Liquor sucked, just stunk. A filly named Smelly Cat won their race. This would have been a great day for Pete to have resorted to a classic college-girl technique of name handicapping. Winners today included the aforementioned Smelly Cat, as well as Special Jo and goddamn Dr. Peter. On the other hand, any technique would have resulted in no worse than equal results to his hours of research. Pete told me he's considering going with hat and shoe sizes next time. "Next time I plan to wear a really shitty shirt," he said. "You know, one I wouldn't mind losing."

Levy Trail

I walked the Levy Trail with the Geezers this morning for 1:08:59.

BRACKETS
After the first weekend of the NCAA Tournament, Pete is in a three-way tie for fourth place in the Democrat-Gazette bracket pool. Pete II is in three-way tie for 45th among 60 entrants.

Oaklawn Park/Bracket

HOT SPRINGS — Tim Cooper and I walked around the Oaklawn Park barns this morning for a total of 48:41. We went very slowly, so we probably didn't go much further than two miles.
I lost $14.00 betting horses and am down $4.50 after ten trips.

BRACKET
After the first three days of the goddamn NCAA Tournament, Pete Perkins is in a four-way tie for fourth among 60 in the Democrat-Gazette pool. Pete Perkins II is in a seven-way tie for 34th

I PLAN TO STAB...
...everyone who eats boneless chicken and anyone who produces anything called chicken tenders or chicken nuggets (except for Jim Perkins and Cheap Dirty Hole, but they're fucking it)

Levy Trail South

I walked Levy Trail South in 33:20 this evening, as exhausted as I was from watching an entire Razorback basketball game, writing roughly 1,100 words about the $900,000 Grade II Rebel Stakes, and writing a would-you-rather followed by a technical breakdown of its wherewithals.
I'm hungrier than two motherfuckers.

I PLAN TO STAB...
...the next person who says, "...kicking the can down the road...," unless, you know, they're talking about kicking a can down the road

Oaklawn Park

HOT SPRINGS—I was at Oaklawn Park for the Rebel Stakes draw this morning and afterward went for a 36:48 walk.

OVERHEARD
"Well, then turn that shit off."
—A horseman in the Oaklawn Park racing office asked that another turn up his radio. He said he really liked the country song coming from it. The guy with the radio said: "The problem is, this ain't Hank. It's some Jap guy."

Levy Trail North

I walked Levy Trail North late this morning in 33:11.

Orange Street Loop

I walked the Orange Street Loop this evening in 49:18.

QUESTION OF THE DAY
Does anyone remember when among the absolute requirements of inclusion in the cool section of American intellectualism was an expressed admiration for Patsy Cline?

Levy Trail South/Hash

I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 34:28, or fuck, it might have been this afternoon. I forgot until about four and a half minutes ago to spring forward and all.
We were out for 1:04:32 on some sexy blonde's Hash run set in a park near Conway. Later we ate at Razorback Pizza in Maumelle. It was fantastic, wonderful pizza, just fucking delicious. It reminded me of the Pizza Hut I fell in love with back in 1968, over in Huntsville, Alabama.

Oaklawn Park

HOT SPRINGS—It was colder than two motherfuckers at Oaklawn Park today. I nevertheless walked all the heck over the place for 54:18, wrote two stories, won $1.40, and am up $9.50 after nine trips. Plus I got to drink a cooler full of iced-down Coors Light as Mary the Daily Racing Form writer and I talked horses and horse writing for an hour and a half in an otherwise empty press box. We had several theories, but neither of us could figure out why the usual crowd of Saturday night drunks left early. As a result, this was the first time after I was through writing that there has ever been a beer left in that thirty-year-old red cooler. I mean, at all, ever, since 1993. I'm not kidding. There were like, no shit, fifteen in there. I drank two, though I briefly considered stuffing the rest in my bag. Now I'm not sure why I didn't.
Oh, I experienced another first tonight when I included the noun mishmash in a story about the Hot Springs Stakes: There were a mishmash of pre-race predictions about how it might unfold, but most of those involved assumed their entrants would face a brisk early pace, and they did.

Oaklawn Park

HOT SPRINGS—I walked for 42:33 from my car, by way of the barns, to the press box at Oaklawn Park this afternoon.

I didn't make a bet.

Little Rock Marathon

I walked for a total 51:20 as I covered the Little Rock Marathon this morning.

Downtown Little Rock

I walked for 38:48 through downtown Little Rock on Wednesday and for 44:56 this evening. Both efforts were set by coverage of the Little Rock Marathon, though tonight's also involved a story about the Arkansas Sports Hall of Fame induction ceremony.