Burns Park Championship Course/Levy Trail Loop/Levy Trail Loop

 Erin Vratil and I walked the Levy Trail Loop on Friday evening in a little over 34 minutes. ...Nearly twelve hours earlier, Erin and I golfed the front nine of at Burns Park Championship Course. I scored 46, with 2 pars, 4 bogies, 2 doubles, and 1 triple. I used 19 putts. Ed scored 46, John 47, and Erin 59. ...This morning, I walked the now more precisely measured Levy Trail Loop in a slower-than-two-motherfuckers 36:17. I paid for my diet of pizza, hamburgers,  potato chips, and dip, absolutely all I was allowed to eat by my guest yesterday.

Burns Park Tournament Course

 I played the back nine of Burns Park Tournament Course this morning in 44, with 1 par, 7 bogies, and 1 double. I used 17 putts. Neither Ed nor John showed. I wouldn't be surprised if they were no more than pools of sweat from their eighteen-hole marathon two days ago.

QUESTION OF THE DAY  If "critical measures of global heating have reached the tipping point," as a 1A headline in the Guardian states a study has found, will everyone shut the fuck up?

Burns Park Championship Course

 John, Ed, a newcomer named Larry, and I played the back nine of Burns Park Championship Course from the silver tees this morning. The other three then played the back nine of the Tournament Course, but even though I felt fine, I was so fucking soaking wet on the hottest and muggiest day of the summer so far, I decided to go home. My house is reasonably clean, but I nevertheless said, "Fellows, with the prettiest Eskimo in Texas coming to visit, I need to go pick up a bit." I scored a 46, with 1 birdie, 6 bogies, 1 double, 1 triple, and used 14 putts. Ed scored 46, and John scored 47. Larry scored 55.

OVERHEARD. ..."Make sure you take a shower."—Ed, after my pick-up-a-bit line

Levy Trail 5K/Hash

 I walked the Levy Trail 5K this morning in 48:12 and went through three miles in 46:43, with splits of 15:55, 15:25, and 15:22. ...I walked and jogged for 59:55 with the Little Rock Hash Harriers at lunchtime today. We started and ended near the Arkansas River on the western outskirts of downtown Little Rock.

OVERHEARD  "I can tell you're getting after it, man."—man I have talked with outside the Levy Church of Christ at least twice before over my years of the Levy Trail

Levy Trail 5K

I walked the Levy Trail 5K this morning in 48:58, with splits of 16:20, 16:25, 14:48, and 1:25. I went through three miles in 47:33. 

Levy Trail 5K

 This odd result interested me. I have never completed a three-mile loop, or three miles into a 5K, in Levy over 50 minutes, partly due to not attempting one unless I knew I could comfortably finish under that mark. Today, I decided I am old enough to quit caring. I kind of hoped to finish over, but when I pulled my watch out of my pocket at the mark (I only remembered in the final second or so), it was at 49:58. I completed the 5K in 51:33.

Levy Trail

 I walked on the Levy Trail early this evening, in shade a much as possible, for 36:12.

OVERHEARD. ..."I don't know if this is the vaccine line, but if it isn't, I'm sure they'll tell us." — lovely 25-year-old woman with a disarming smile and voice as she spoke to her dour-looking teenage brother at the Sherwood Walmart pharmacy. They stood in line with exactly 40 others. Rockamundo read on Google News today that Fox News hosts had begun to advocate vaccines, so perhaps this was in part a byproduct of that

Burns Park Championship Course

John, Ed, and I played the Burns Park Championship Course this morning. I scored 96, with nines of 48 and 48. I had 1 birdie, 4 pars, 5 bogies, 6 doubles, 1 quadruple, and 1 quintuple (5-over).  I used 35 putts. Ed scored 94 and John 102. The silver tees are too long for our games now, but it looks as if that's where we'll play. 

Levy Trail North

 I walked Levy Trail North this morning in 32:37.

Burns Park Tournament Course

 Ed and I played Burns Park Championship Course from the silver tees this morning. The silver tees measure 5,400 yards, or 880 yards longer than the pink tees at 4,520. It's similar to the difference between the yellow and red tees at First Tee, 5,580 and 4,396, respectively. Ed scored 90, and I scored 93, with nines of 47 and 46. I had 2 pars, 12 bogies, 3 doubles, 1 triple, and used 33 putts.

Levy Trail South

 Understand, I have eaten very well the last several days. This morning, in a cool mist, I walked Levy Trail South in 29:24 and got home just in time to see the second-to-last group tee off for the final round of the Open Championship. ...Late this afternoon, I walked an out-and-back total of about a mile and a half with the Hash House Harriers. It was especially short in deference to Hashers who ran the Midnight 25 and 50Ks last night.

Levy Trail Loop

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop this morning in 32:19. Now, I am back in my house cheering like two motherfuckers for Lodwicus Theodorus "Louis" Oosthuizen to win the Open Championship.

QUESTIONS OF THE DAY. ...Did researchers at the Wuhan Institue of Virology hold significant shares of stock in golf products, recreational vehicles, treadmills, delivery services, and/or alcoholic beverages, or were they directed by the Communist Party of China to find a way to encourage supporters of President Trump to kill themselves, collateral damage be damned?

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 32:42.

Levy Trail Loop

 My attempt to walk slowly enough to not sweat failed this morning as I walked the Levy Trail Loop in 37:02.

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South late this morning in 34:17.

Levy Trail South

 I walked Levy Trail South this morning in 34:56.

Levy Trail Loop

 I walked the Levy Trail Loop this morning in 35:38.

Hash

 We were out for something ridiculous like ninety minutes on our Hash run from Zach's and Lacey's house this afternoon. ...Pet owners in the greater Little Rock metropolitan area are bitching like two motherfuckers on Facebook about tonight's fireworks. Joe, as he smoked a cigarette on our couch, asked me to post something about how they should go fuck themselves.

Burns Park Championship Course

 John and I played Burns Park Championship Course this morning. I scored 92 with 3 pars, 11 bogies, 2 doubles, and 2 triples. I used 36 putts. John scored 96. Because of the head professional's criticism of Joe's use of magnets on the course, Joe subjected him to nitrous oxide, got him laughing really hard, and then ran him feet-first through a meat grinder. He posted this horror on YouTube to get the word out that he is not a cat to fuck with.