I ran for somewhere in the neighborhood of forty-five minutes on Janine's Little Rock Hash House Harrier run at lunchtime today. Afterward, I raced an official fundraising Fleet Feet Beer Mile in 28:42. I missed a couple of marks and probably walked more like a mile and a half. One of the race officials, who I dated for several weeks in the fall of 2004, was flabbergasted I had no telephone in my pants. She said, "What if they need you at work?" Somehow, the three women running the show let me race without signing the obligatory heart-attack waiver, which requires a telephone in this new world, the one in which the Green Bay Packers lose to the New York Giants, New York Jets, and Detroit Lions in the same Goddamn Season. ...My Oaklawn Sports losses rose to $16.25 with Philly's loss last night, meaning I will likely have to hold up liquor stores and minimarts for a while. Fortunately, though it is perfectly legal to rob people in Levy, I forgot to bet Sunday Night Football.
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