When I first signed up for Oaklawn Sports, my first-lifetime chance to make legal bets on football (and baseball and all the rest), I worried about my general proclivity to addiction. After two months of turning $20 into $7.84 with a run of steady betting, I believe I might have a chance of not handing a racetrack in Hot Springs my massive fortune. You know, maybe. ...Joe's Silver Bullet Bet of a Lifetime for today is to bet $2 and to take the Buffalo Bills to give up 10.5 or more points to the Green Bay Packers on Sunday Night Football. Kickoff is scheduled for 5:20 p.m. Pacific on NBC: The Packers suck dicks. All week, I have read pantless experts write Green Bay will make the playoffs. It will not. The Packers will spend the rest of the season, including tonight, sucking men's dicks. That, in itself, is fine. I love them however they choose to behave. They could force hundreds of Koreans to stampede each other to death or crack the Speaker of our House of Representatives husband's skull with a hammer, and I would love them (not because of those acts, but rather for a lifetime of Sunday afternoon entertainment). Still, the Buffalo Bills will score however many points they want against my favorite goddamn motherfucking sons of shit-eating whore bitches who have decided not to play football this season. They will get started tonight at 5:20 Pacific, 7:20 Central. ...I fell asleep long before the Packers' 27-17 loss to Buffalo was complete and guess I should be happy I lost two motherfucking dollars. However, I am not.
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