CONWAY—These days, whether you're a college girl or a middle-aged sportswriter, you have to remain paranoid every minute of every day, no matter what.
I still haven't figured out this Bears Loop (named after two Bears, the Hall of Fame golfer from Ohio and a dead dog from south Texas). Today, my attempt was foiled by a pretty coed and contemporary western civilization's insistence that we panic, act rashly, and generally go ape-shit in order to remain safe no matter what, in this case on a trail out on the Jewel Moore Nature Preserve.
There are at least three marked entries to the trails, and after entering near the middle, I decided to start by walking to the main entrance and then back. However, about twenty yards from the main entryway, a lovely coed walked into the preserve. She smiled at me without so much as a hint of provocation and said something like hi or hello, and my plan to turn back around was thwarted. To have done so would've put exactly two people in a rather large nature area—one a 20-year-old woman and the other a 59-year-old man following the former by less than half a football field. To avoid the possibility that I would have scared her close to death and perhaps had the police called on me two hours before kickoff, I just walked on back to and around the crowded campus for a total of 1:09:17.
This is why I prefer to watch football on TV in Levy with no one else around.
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