I walked 3.2 miles on the River Trail and Big Dam Bridge this morning in 50:19. My legs are deader than the Houston Astros' playoff hopes, at least as dead as Neil Armstrong, and sore.
According to Google Earth, which I must assume is nearly as accurate as the odometer on my Camry, it is exactly 0.80 miles from one end of the Big Dam Bridge to the other.
Someone has painted a new message on the Big Dam Bridge, which if read from top to bottom*, says, "TRAFFIC MERGING TO YIELD." Yield of what, I wonder? And shouldn't that be "...into yield."? Whatever, it makes about as much sense as the original messages, "NOW DOWN SLOW BIKERS," and "RIGHT STAY WALKERS."
Here are how these messages appear, with one word on each line:
RETARDS
FUCKING
YOU
TRAFFIC
MERGING
TO
YIELD
*the only way in which any culture in the recorded history of mankind has printed its language, except apparently for the Little Rock Parks and Recreation Department
OVERHEARD
"There that bitch. She way over at the meat section."
—fellow shopper at Kroger
"It's time to get famous. It's time to get famous on they ass."
—Cincinnati second baseman Brandon Philips after his seventh-inning home run against the St. Louis Cardinals on Saturday
"Elsbury thought for sure he might've been able to score."
—Kansas City Royals' announcer late in the Kansas City-Boston game Saturday night
"I think she's just rude. I mean, every time she comes walking in, she has a big scowl on her face."
—a woman jogger
"Well, you know, if I don't have my hearing aid on, they could be shouting and I still wouldn't have any idea what they were saying."
—old man on a recumbent bicycle to a younger man on a regular bike
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