Levy Loop

I just stepped in this morning from setting the 1,981st annual Baby Jesus Memorial Two-Mile Race to Hell and Back for the Little Rock Hash House Harriers. It took me about thirty-seven minutes, which included a stop to talk to a woman named Ally on Hillside Drive. She was out to take her dog for a walk. She told me she had lost ninety-eight pounds in the last four years, and was just about to start jogging.

There was a five-way tie for first place in the Baby Jesus Memorial Two-Mile Race to Hell and Back. Hashers named David, Scott, Kayce Hall, and Zach and Lacey ran the course in 18:58. I thought for sure someone would break my Levy Loop course record of 14:52, set in 1997, but most of the runners showed up drunk or stuffed full of Christmas food.

Cooper Bowl
COMPLETE SELLOUTS 137.78, GREEN BAY PACKERS 97.31: Aaron Rodgers threw five touchdown passes on Sunday night, his highest total of the season, but they were not enough for the Democrat Football League Packers. The Sellouts easily held on to win their fifth Cooper Bowl.
"Oh well," Packers owner Pete Perkins said. "As I've always said, it's better to have loved and lost than to have never lost at all. Now I can return to my original interest in real football."
Perkins also owns part of the National Football League Packers, who took advantage of Rodgers' performance for a 35-21 victory over the Chicago Bears. The Packers improved to 14-1 and clinched home-field advantage through the playoffs.