Levy Loop

Cold wind and Pam have returned of course. I wore gloves this morning, and walked the Levy Loop in 29:33.

This afternoon I took advantage of Burns Park's $8 happy hour (after 2 p.m.) and played the front nine of the shorter course, the one to the right of the club house, and scored a 44, with 2 pars (Nos. 2 and 9), 5 bogies, and 2 doubles (Nos. 1 and 6). I used 16 putts, and the heavy putter Jeff Krupsaw gave me in the late spring of 2006 for all shots inside 30 yards. The glue job on the driver did not work and I am nearly certain someone explained to Scott Vratil there is no way in the fucking world I would consider using an acetylene torch. I have two other drivers and probably half a dozen three-woods I am considering taking to the golf store for a severe shaft reduction; my hope is the golf geeks will think I am having the club shortened for a child or small woman. "You're going to putt with this? Okay."

Orange Street Loop

I ran the Orange Street Loop, through soft wind and rain, in 28:05, with splits of 9:59, 9:24, and 8:42.

Park Hill Loop

I expected to walk a lot this evening, the protocol of my recent runs, but did not; instead, I felt good from the start, from which I underestimated the liveliness of my legs and proceeded through the Park Hill Loop in 48:38, with splits of 10:17, 10:12, 9:38, 9:40, and 8:51.

Levy Loop

I picked up this computer to report on my 30:17 circuit of the Levy Loop when Erin Vratil skyped me. I was delighted to learn that Skype works even when it has not been engaged, and pleased to see Scott and Jan Vratil for the first time in nearly three years.

York Gary Loop/Nashville misc.

NASHVILLE—Wednesday night, at about 9 p.m., I ran the two-mile York Gary Loop in 19:48. Last night, after eating all day, I walked from my mother's house to downtown Nashville, walked through downtown, then retraced the route my mother and her twin sister Jean walked from the First Baptist Church to their mother's house the night of Dec. 7, 1941. They were fearful the whole way that Japanese soldiers were hiding behind trees, prepared to cut them to pieces. Afterward, I walked back to mom's from what we Crutchfield grandchildren called "Granny's." I was out for 31:53 and probably covered about two miles. I imagined walking that route again on Dec. 7, 2041, as an 82-year-old, and writing an essay about it. The clarity of my mother's and Aunt Jean's memory of that walk always interested me.

First Tee/Levy Loop

I am happy the Broadmoor-Levy Cup remains in Levy, but little else about my round with Jeff Krupsaw today pleased me. I won 54-58 at First Tee. I had 6 bogies, 1 double, and 2 pentagonals. Krup had 2 bogies, 4 doubles, 1 triple, and 2 quadruples. We were tied at No. 9. Krup hit his tee shot into the water; mine bounced into the rocks by the water and was unplayable. I hit from the drop area to three feet with the lob wedge Chris Vratil gave me to save bogey. Krup hit into the water again, then into the bunker, and finished with an eight.

Then I walked the Levy Loop in 30:22.

Levy Loop

I walked the Levy Loop this morning, starting at about 9 a.m. Central, in 29:22.

This evening I sat on my couch, listening to Bruce Hornsby and the Range (the first time I have listened to music on my CD/DVD player since 2006) and watching the Tennessee Titans-Houston Texans on nfl.com. Tennessee tailback Chris Johnson had to score 15 points for the Green Bay Packers to defeat the Fat Chicks in the Democrat Football League. He needed to rush for 150 yards. When Tennessee received a punt with about three minutes left in the fourth quarter, Johnson had 122 yards. He rushed for 22 yards on one carry while I was in the bathroom. He needed six more yards. On the first play after the two minute warning, Johnson ran for seven yards. Tennessee kicked its game-winning field goal on the next play and the Green Bay Packers won 98.11-97.92, the narrowest margin of victory in DFL history, breaking the record established with Krup's Kids' 116.77-116.41 victory over Dead Elway in the 10th game of the 2007 season.

Ghetto Cat Loop

I walked the Ghetto Cat Loop this morning in 28:52.

Levy Loop/33rd Street Loop

I walked the Levy Loop this morning in 30:06.

I jogged the first three miles of the 33rd Street Loop, starting at about 6:30 p.m., and then walked home. I was out for 33:31 , with splits of 11:03, 11:11, and 11:17. It's been eight days since my legs last felt good running. For some reason, I had nice runs on Nov. 10, 11, and 13, when those three interrupted about two months of feeling like I did tonight. Oh well.

Ghetto Cat Loop/Maple Street Loop

I walked the Ghetto Cat Loop in 29:43* this morning.

This evening, at about 5:30 Central, I jogged and ran the Maple Street Loop in 19:43, with splits of 10:21 and 9:22.

*I was embarrassed to write earlier that I again participated in a solitary game of prediction, but fuck it. For a while, until it bores me or I forget, I plan to see how close to 30 minutes I can walk these two-mile loops. I should eventually nail it, like golfers who consistently stick short irons within five feet of the pin. I figure a hole-in-one equivalent would be in the 29:59.5-30:00.49 range.

First Tee/Levy Loop

I played two loops of the par-three course using two balls at First Tee, starting at about noon Central. I had 14 pars, 11 bogies, 10 doubles, and 1 triple. That's 142 strokes, four more than last week. Then I played the first four holes of the big course with four consecutive bogies, concluding on No. 4 with a 223-yard drive, a 165-yard five-iron to the rough above the green to the left, a pitch to six feet, and a downhill, right-to-left putt that missed by a cunt hair and stopped maybe six inches past.

Somewhat exhausted and hungrier than two motherfuckers, I walked the Levy Loop in 31:34.

River Trail

I wanted to run 10 miles today, but could not. The weather was perfect for an attempt; 50 degrees, calm, with a deep gray canopy. My legs weren't. Instead of 10, I ran four, out and back from the Big Dam Bridge, in 39:40, with splits of 10:13, 10:16, 9:52, and 9:19.

Levy Loop

I walked a prediction Levy Loop this morning with a prediction of 30 minutes, and got it in 30:14. I'm a little rusty.

Ghetto Cat Loop/Orange Street Loop

It always surprises me when I'm reminded how readily smells are borne by the crisp, almost metallic air of fall and shit. This morning in windy gray, damp mid-50s along the Ghetto Cat Loop, I crossed block-long wafts of chicken from, I believe, the Dixie Pig, and then donuts from Mark's. I jogged for a total of five minutes and otherwise walked to complete the loop in 26:51.

It's definitely fall. I didn't need weather.com to confirm that, only to specify that the temperature is 45 degrees with an 18 mile-an-hour wind (gusting to 26). I jogged the Orange Street Loop, at about 5:30 p.m. Central, wearing gloves and ear muffs, in 30:35, with splits of 10:20, 10:07, and 10:08.

Hash

I jogged non-stop on Walt Webb's Hash run from Walt's house, across the river, to the Clinton museum, through the River Market, and back to Walt's. I was out for 42:38, so covered close to four miles, maybe a little more. I have Hashed somewhat regularly since June, 1980, and I'm pretty fucking sure that's the first time I have ever run a run non-stop. The fast people stayed far enough ahead to figure out the checks and the slow people lagged behind, so I ran alone for all but the first mile or so.

Levy Loop

It's 6:34 p.m. Central in the middle of November and 65 degrees. I'm on my front porch, sweating a little from a tour of the Levy Loop, jogged in 20:44, with splits of 10:47 and 9:57. I walked the Levy Loop this morning, with about two minutes of easy jogging, in something like 29:30; I cleared my watch and can't remember the exact time.

Ghetto Cat Loop/First Tee

It's 37 degrees this morning; nevertheless, I am slathered in sweat after a record-smashing run of the Ghetto Cat Loop, completed in 19:42, with splits of 10:11 and 9:31. This recent prevalence of energy confuses me.

Starting at about 1 p.m. Central, I played two loops of the Par-3 course at First Tee using two balls. I had 3 birdies, 13 pars, 13 bogies, 3 doubles, 2 triples, and 2 quadruples.

Ghetto Cat Loop/Levy Loop

I walked the Ghetto Cat Loop in 31:29 this morning.*

This evening, beginning at about 6:30 p.m. Central, I jogged for five minutes and otherwise walked the Levy Loop in 26:30.

*as for the "gnarly" fantasy football game, the Green Bay Packers went into Monday Night Football trailing Dead Elway, 124.96-123.70. Both teams had one defensive lineman going. Dead Elway, by the far the best team in the league, failed to get points from their player. My guy, Elvis Dumervil of the Denver Broncos, got half a sack for two points and we won 125.70-124.96, the fifth closest game since the Democrat Football League was formed in 1997.

33rd Street Loop

I ran the 33rd Street Loop in 47:47, with splits of 9:42, 9:35, 9:37, 9:39, and 9:14. This was the second consecutive day I have felt good running; I wish I could attribute that to the steak, pizza, and Mexican food I ate while Dad was here.

Orange Street Loop

Fueled by all the pizza I could eat at Larry's, consumed about two and a half hours ago, I ran the Orange Street Loop in 29:22, with splits of 9:58, 9:38, and 9:47.

Ghetto Cat Loop

I jogged the Ghetto Cat Loop this morning, at about 8:30 Central, in 21:18*, with splits of 10:54 and 10:34. Later, after moving the soft green chair into my back bedroom and buying a lamp to put beside it, I spent two hours mulching leaves, raking, and sweeping the walk and driveway to get ready for Dad's arrival with the pretty yet conservative red and green chair he first offered me five years ago.

*easily a Ghetto Cat Loop record since it was the first time I've run it

Hash

I'm in a, like, gnarly fantasy football game dude; but, it didn't keep me from Hash, where I ran about three miles through Alsopp Park and around Hillcrest on a run set by Mike Wickline. Please cheer for Dallas' Miles Austin and Philadelphia's DeSean Jackson and fly to Philadelphia and shoot Tony Romo.

Levy Loop

I jogged the Levy Loop in 21:33. I forgot to take the mile split, but figure I ran the second a little faster, since on the first I went so slowly I nearly tripped over my feet a couple of times. My forever clunky legs felt fine at this pace (4:42:30 marathon). The weather was ideal for a short jog; 62 degrees with a light breeze in the moonlight.

Ridge Road Loop/Fort Roots

I ran and walked the Ridge Road Loop this morning for the first time since Oct. 16 last year, and now am seated on my front porch in a 67-degree light breeze with the smell and colors of fall all around and Jo licking the sweat off my left leg. I covered the loop, with 25 minutes of walking, in 48:10, with splits of 12:39, 12:35, 11:42, and 11:13.

John Kelly and I played Fort Roots, beginning at about 3:15 p.m. Central. I won 46-63. I had 2 pars, 4 bogies, 2 doubles, and 1 triple. John had 2 pars, 1 double, 2 triples, 2 quadruples, 1 pentagonal, and 1 heptagonal.

Orange Street Loop

It was 48 degrees, which felt good on this late-night run of the Orange Street Loop, completed in 27:54, with splits of 9:24, 9:18, and 9:12.

Ghetto Cat Loop/First Tee

I like the Ghetto Cat Loop. It has some stretches that I have rarely run or walked in my nearly 23-year Levy experience—offers lots of new poor people a chance to look oddly at me and wonder whether I'm a cop. Unfortunately, I haven't seen the Jo-like black cat again. I walked the loop this morning at about 8 a.m. Central.

One thing about my golf game has remained unchanged; three consecutive days is too many. I played a total of 13 holes with Jeff Krupsaw, and won the Levy-Broadmoor Cup by three strokes with a 45. Then we played the first four holes again. Overall, I had 4 pars, 5 bogies, and 4 doubles. As the final hole of the day, we played No. 4, the long motherfucker, for a $10 million gift card from Walmart. I hit a mediocre drive, and then a 200-yard five-wood to the left fringe, three inches off the green, 40 feet away, and three putted from there for bogie. Krupsaw doubled, after spending the length of the fairway wondering how long it would take Jill to get used to a wardrobe limited to Walmart clothing and whether we could buy big-ticket items and resell them to friends for the sake of pocket dough.

OVERHEARD

"Technology can't help that swing."

— Johnny Miller on NBC's live coverage of the Levy-Broadmoor Cup

Fort Roots/35th Street Loop

This was a very good, post-golf run. I jogged and walked, for a total of four minutes, the 35th Street Loop in 44:22, with splits of 11:26, 11:00, 10:51, and 11:05.

I began that run about 45 minutes after completing 18 holes, played at Fort Roots in 93, with nines of 47 and 46. I had 1 birdie, 2 pars, 8 bogies, 5 doubles, and 2 triples. I used 33 putts.

Levy Loop/Fort Roots

This morning at about 7 a.m. Central I jogged and walked the Levy Loop in 22:40.

Again, as David Duval said, "I'm close. I know I've been saying it a long time and no one's believed me, but I've been so close." Today, starting at about 2:30 p.m., in 70-degree sunshine, I played Fort Roots with Del, the only guy I really liked among the old men I played with the summer of 2008, in 46, with 2 pars, 4 bogies, 2 doubles, and 1 triple. I used 17 putts. I hit a ball over the wall on the par-5 No. 7, my only lost ball and the only bad drive I hit, which led to the triple.

Now I plan to cook bratwurst and French fries and feed myself and Tim Cooper as we watch Benton's Cliff Lee win a 1-0 victory for the Phillies over North Little Rock's A.J. Burnett.

Hash

I ran pretty much non-stop for 56:09 on a Hash run set all over Levy and Park Hill from the Ewbank's rent house to John Kelly's to cover well over four miles.